It’s been tickling at the edge of my mind – why are the McCain folks so focused on Bill Ayers? Besides the fact that the central allegation of Obama somehow secretly supporting Vietnam-era terrorism he couldn’t have understood at the time is patently ridiculous, it’s largely a case of guilt by osmosis. Obama was in the same place as Ayers at a few points in time, which ergo makes him Ayers’ BFF.
You may ask, would John McCain ever hold himself to this same standard? Fuck yes, he would.
Asked afterward about whether he was suggesting that McCain’s fling with a Latin hottie counted as Latin America foreign policy experience, [McCain advisor Richard] Fontaine said: ”The only thing I was trying to convey was that his experience goes back a long way,” Fontaine said. “He was born in Panama, which illustrates a lifetime spent in Latin America. He has known a lot of people. The thing about the Brazilian girlfriend was in his first memoir, and it stuck in my brain. Look at the two candidates and contrast his extensive experience. That’s the only point I was trying to make.”
Comfortingly, this means that a threesome with a Jew and a Muslim will qualify you to be Secretary of State*.
*Apparently, mocking racism, bigotry and idiocy by pointing out its ridiculous ends is itself racist and bigoted. Somehow. Accordingly, I will only blog about the finer points of Microsoft Excel and my favorite colors in an effort to avoid offending anyone who may ever find themselves incapable of understanding how humor as a commentary tool works. Tomorrow: forest green and the “Sort” function.