okay The Point Of Life Is To Reflect Your Values At All Times
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The Point Of Life Is To Reflect Your Values At All Times
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It’s time again for our yearly quarterly Google Outrage.

For those of you who aren’t aware, a Google Outrage happens either when Google changes their logo but chooses, say, the 25th anniversary of Tetris over the 65th anniversary of D-Day (because we always celebrate the 65th anniversary of things, you know), or when Google doesn’t change their homepage on a day that’s important to conservatives, like Ronald Reagan’s birthday or Super Saturdays down at the local Putt-Putt.

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There are two overarching issues with Google Outrages. First, it presumes that people actually view the Google homepage as an authoritative resource on This Day In History, and that a generation of children will somehow gaze upon Google.com for longer than it takes them to type in “gears of war faq” and hit Enter and believe that nothing else happened on June 6th throughout all of history. Second, it presumes that a company which has, this year, commemorated Giovanni Schiaparelli, Dr. Seuss and Jackson Pollock’s birthdays is somehow choosing what days to commemorate based off of a desire to commemorate some message about America’s greatness.

Anyway, what happened this time was that Google commemorated Tetris’s 25th anniversary on June 6th…and didn’t commemorate the 65th anniversary of D-Day (my guess is because 65 is not as much of a landmark anniversary as 25, and Google is a technology company, and seriously?). Predictably, Google hates America and is advancing an anti-American agenda.

These are also the people who go to baseball games and are convinced that their birthday isn’t on the scoreboard because the Atlanta Braves hate Christians.

If these fine Americans find themselves unable to handle the fact that Google may not at all times reflect their particular preferences in logo design, may I recommend using the power of the market to use any of the other dozen search engines available, such as Bing.com, which currently showcases white text on a large photo background, because it’s apparently 1997 and that’s how webpages are designed. Alternately, there’s Lycos. They have Angelfire pages!

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Bob Goosmann (Facebook)
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