Jon Stewart roasts Stu Varney: The Pope doesn’t ‘slap Jamie Dimon’s d*ck out of your mouth’
Daily Show host Jon Stewart let loose on Stuart Varney’s “deep fried in contempt, seasoned with disdain” stance against the fast food workers protesting nationwide for the minimum wage to be raised — and against Pope Francis in particular for attacking the idolatry of money.
“You’re going up against the Pope?” Stewart asked incredulously. “You’re going up against the Pope on how to help the poor? Helping the poor’s in this man’s wheelhouse. This pope helps the poor. But you’re telling him how to do his job? The Pope doesn’t come over to where you work and slap Jamie Dimon’s d*ck out of your mouth.”
After watching clips of Varney asking to focus on “the economics” of a prospective $15 minimum wage when it was convenient for him, Stewart compared the Fox Business host to another Englishman, Ebenezer Scrooge, saying his rhetoric “is usually followed by a visit from a dead business partner and the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.”
Stewart also shot down CNBC host Larry Kudlow’s declaration that since “charity is a gospel value, that puts free-market capitalism on the right side of the Lord.”
“Exactly — free-market capitalism on the right side of the Lord. Who says you can’t serve both God and money? Who would say such a thing?” Stewart exclaimed, as a graphic explained that Jesus Christ said just that in the book of Matthew. Upon seeing the picture of Jesus, Stewart covered, saying, “That’s not fair. Look at the beard. Guy’s clearly a Marxist.”
However, Stewart also conceded to feeling he had some common ground with Varney.
“We both actually agree that some people are being paid too much money to shovel unappetizing, unhealthy sh*t to the American public,” Stewart said. “We just disagree on who those people are and where they work.”
Watch Stewart rip Varney and Kudlow below.