MARTHA'S TEACHINGS
Lessons in accountability from our nation's leaders

By Anthony Layser| RAW STORY COLUMNIST

The infamous "seven-minute silence" following President Bush being informed the country was under attack has now been seen by 12 million theatergoers and counting thanks to Fahrenheit 9/11. While W. has never provided a clear explanation of his inactivity to the American people, he did give one to the 9/11 Commission during his and Dick Cheney's closed-door testimony. A member of the commission summed it up this way: "The President felt he should project strength and calm until he could better understand what was happening."

It's not quite clear what understanding of the developing crisis he was attempting to gain by remaining seated in that Florida classroom and listening to children read My Pet Goat.. However, one thing dawned on me from watching video of the incident: Those 20 or so kids never doubted his strength and calm. They followed his example and stayed remarkably well behaved as the rest of America swirled with panic.

It's exactly that kind of prioritizing that leads me to believe the president truly cares about America's youth, despite No Child Left Behind and the runaway deficit.

In these uncertain times, America's children can learn so much from its leaders. Why stop at lessons about sitting still? Take a concept everyone must come to terms with at an early age — accountability. I plucked a couple famous names from the headlines to help me illustrate my point, and came up with three noteworthy lessons about accountability. Listen up, kids

Martha Stewart says: "Portray yourself as a victim."

After being sentenced to five months in prison last week, Martha Stewart published a letter on her website, telling fans of her sadness over how the "power of the press and the persistence of the government" debilitated the operations of her Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia. "In the face of all that has happened, I remained uplifted by those people who have stood by me and believed in me during this long nightmare." From this heartfelt epistle, you almost don't know whether to feel more sorry for Martha or for her former employees, who were seemingly laid off by the media and government. It's enough to make you forget a jury of Ms. Stewart's peers found her guilty of breaking the law.

President Bush says: "Backpedaling is your best friend."

In numerous speeches and press conferences leading up to the war in Iraq, our chief exec had no qualms summoning images of 9/11 and Saddam Hussein in the same breath. "Long established ties," was a popular administration catchphrase used to describe Iraq's "relationship" with al-Qaeda. Polls showed many Americans believed Hussein was in some way responsible for 9/11. Last week, however, the 9/11 Commission released a staff report stating the only evidence of contact came in 1996 when al-Qaeda "explored possible cooperation with Iraq," but that "Iraq apparently never responded." Bush's response: "This administration never said that the 9/11 attacks were orchestrated between Saddam and al-Qaeda. We did say there were contacts between Saddam Hussein and al-Qaeda." By the same rationale, all a guy has to do is call a girl and automatically they're a couple, even if she doesn't call him back. As a reason to go to war it sounds a bit farfetched, but don't accuse W of a failure of imagination.

Former Enron CEO Ken Lay says: "Make sure you have a scapegoat."

"I take responsibility for what happened at Enron, but I cannot take responsibility for criminal conduct I was not aware of," explained Ken Lay in an interview after being indicted. Lay claimed the majority of blame should be placed on CFO Andrew Fastow. "He was misleading me on the board.... I still find it disgusting as to what happened, because of what he did." Good thing that in October 2001, Lay limited an internal Enron inquiry after vice president Sherron Watkins warned of impending legal repercussions. During that investigation, Lay ordered company lawyers not to second-guess accountants and neither he nor departed CEO Jeffrey Skilling were questioned. Ignorance is bliss, and a solid policy when it comes to establishing scapegoats.

You don't have to be indicted, convicted of fraud, or in the middle of a re-election attempt when it comes to being smart about accountability. There are numerous ways these lessons can come in very handy. When faced with conflicts concerning chores, school assignments, and interpersonal relationships, kids can learn so much from Martha, Ken and George W. Why take responsibility for your actions? Be a victim, backpedal, and have a scapegoat ready. It's amazing how effective these practices can be.