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How to write a popular online article

By Amanda Marcotte
Saturday, January 10, 2009 18:48 EDT
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Step one: Fulfill some stereotype that sexist men have about women, especially those who they think are trying to have their feminist cake and eat it with a side of dependence and chivalry. Ideally, you get pregnant to trap a man into paying child support. As this doesn’t really happen, your other option is to be a spoiled brat in some form or another. Being a woman who has difficult career aspirations, demands an apartment in Manhattan, and nearly dumps your poor husband because he can’t make enough money so that you can depend on him whether you’re a freelancer or a housewife will do.

Step two: Write about it in a way that makes it seem like you’re oblivious to the implications. Ignore that a bunch of misogynists are going to eat this shit up, because it proves that women don’t really want equality, they want to leech off men, but want an excuse to say no to sexual “duties” or doing all the housework. Don’t wink at the sexist audience, or they’ll know that you’re pandering to them.

Step three: Up to you. You can either end your story by reforming your ways by letting go of the princess shit a little bit, or end by being an even bigger princess. Either way, misogynists are vindicated, and that’s what’s important.

Step four: Not yours to take. This is up to the feminists who have to wear ourselves out pointing out that most women are not overly demanding people with skewed expectations, and that equality means that even the clueless members of our gender have full rights, in the same way that clueless men have full rights.

Amanda Marcotte
Amanda Marcotte
Amanda Marcotte is a freelance journalist born and bred in Texas, but now living in the writer reserve of Brooklyn. She focuses on feminism, national politics, and pop culture, with the order shifting depending on her mood and the state of the nation.
 
 
 
 
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