The Diet And Habits Of Left Wing Agitators

By Jesse Taylor
Wednesday, April 8, 2009 23:58 EDT
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imageTax Day Tea Parties, as sponsored by Fox News, will heat up the nation next week. But, given the conservative propensity to attract crazy motherfuckers who are arming themselves to avoid the FEMA concentration camps, how will they explain the rather large number of people holding signs asking for Barack Obama’s birth certificate and worrying about Democrats putting things up their butts?

Simple. They’ll just say they were all liberals posing as conservatives. You see, ACORN and…

…Yeah, I know, ACORN. They’re like George Soros if George Soros could split himself into 10,000 George Soroses and every single one of them was stealing money from your bank account to register heroin addicts to vote a hundred times each for gay Muslims. And then each of them made six billion dollars off of each vote.

So, anyway, ACORN and the Huffington Post are going to infiltrate Tea Parties and act as agent provocateurs. Because otherwise nobody crazy will come to a poorly defined large-scale midday protest on a weekday afternoon, and what fun will that be?

How are you going to ruin shit for everyone?

Jesse Taylor
Jesse Taylor
Jesse Taylor is an attorney and blogger from the great state of Ohio. He founded Pandagon in July, 2002, and has also served on the campaign and in the administration of former Ohio Governor Ted Strickland. He focuses on politics, race, law and pop culture, as well as the odd personal digression when the mood strikes.
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