The Cheney Will Take Over Your Surface World

By Jesse Taylor
Wednesday, December 2, 2009 0:45 EDT
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imageThe simple answer to the question of why Dick Cheney is a spiteful, hateful ghoul of a human being probably has a lot to do with the fact that Cheney is vastly hated, but he was never humbled.

Although Fallows is wrong about Bush’s overwhelming and uncritical graciousness towards Obama (and, to be fair, I think that ex-presidents should be free to openly discuss their successors), he looks like he’s planning out Obama’s next birthday party compared to Cheney.

Cheney spent the past, oh, half decade getting less popular than that kid in grade school who never really seemed to shower, but he also spent that same time holing himself away from anything that even resembled reality. It’s easy to burst on the scene in 2009, guns blazing like an asshole who blazes lots of guns, when you’ve spent the past several years convincing yourself that everyone in the world is your enemy because they’re stupid and dumb and have Nikes and Sega Genesis.

Or wait, no, that was me when I wasn’t showering in sixth grade. Shit.

Dick Cheney is the worst kind of dick – the kind who has the ability to hear exactly what he wants, when he wants, and has just enough pull with just enough other dicks to ensure that someone will always broadcast what he says. Bush may not be any better, he just lacked the ability to go hide in an undisclosed location for months at a time and refuse to talk to anyone but Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity’s hair.

Jesse Taylor
Jesse Taylor
Jesse Taylor is an attorney and blogger from the great state of Ohio. He founded Pandagon in July, 2002, and has also served on the campaign and in the administration of former Ohio Governor Ted Strickland. He focuses on politics, race, law and pop culture, as well as the odd personal digression when the mood strikes.
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