‘Daily Show’ correspondent: Cain provided ‘financial assistance to my vagina’

By David Edwards
Wednesday, November 30, 2011 9:07 EDT
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Jon Stewart and Samantha Bee reveal new Herman Cain affair
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During Tuesday night’s show, Comedy Central host Jon Stewart’s report on Herman Cain’s alleged 13-year affair with Ginger White was interrupted by the breaking news that correspondent Samantha Bee was currently in bed with the candidate.

“13 years!” Stewart exclaimed as the show began. “That is an admirable commitment to the woman whom you are violating your spousal commitment with. And two, after all of those allegations of sexual harassment of underlings, nice to see Herman Cain going the consensual route. Kudos.”

While Cain says that White was just a friend who he was helping to find a job, she claims that he provided regular financial support for years.

“Do you how often married men give money to women they have been acquainted with for 13 years but haven’t had sex with?” correspondent Wyatt Cenac asked Stewart. “Never. Doesn’t happen. Go ahead. Try it. The check won’t even clear.”

“We’ve got breaking news of another Herman Cain sexual allegation,” Stewart announced. “Samantha Bee. Sam, where are you?”

“Jon, I’m in room 307 of the Four Seasons [Hotel] in Hillsdale, Michigan, and I can now tell you with absolute certainty where the next Cain bombshell will come from,” Bee reported. “As God is my witness, I am telling you now that Herman Cain is underneath my skirt.”

“Sam, this is it,” Stewart replied. “This is direct evidence of impropriety.”

“No, not according to Herman Cain,” Bee pointed out. “He has issued a statement admitting that he knows me and is, in fact, under my skirt, but he says he’s just providing some much-needed financial assistance to my vagina — as a friend.”

“Can you confirm that?” Stewart wondered.

“Well, I can confirm that Herman Cain does not understand the term ‘financial assistance,’” Bee said.

Watch these video from Comedy Central’s The Daily Show, broadcast Nov. 29, 2011.

David Edwards
David Edwards
David Edwards has served as an editor at Raw Story since 2006. His work can also be found at Crooks & Liars, and he's also been published at The BRAD BLOG. He came to Raw Story after working as a network manager for the state of North Carolina and as as engineer developing enterprise resource planning software. Follow him on Twitter at @DavidEdwards.
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