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Cain sings, quotes Pokémon to rally Colbert supporters

By David Edwards
Friday, January 20, 2012 15:34 EDT
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Stephen Colbert rallies in South Carolina
 
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Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert and former Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain joined forces on Friday at a rally in Charleston, South Carolina.

During the “Rock Me Like a Herman Cain South Cain-Olina Primary Rally,” Colbert urged attendees to support him by casting their vote for Cain in Saturday’s Republican primary. Although Cain is no longer running for office, his name still appears on the ballot but Colbert’s does not.

“I want to salute the other candidates in the race,” Colbert told the crowd. “I think people are hungering for a positive campaign so I’m not going to go after this man’s opponents. I won’t be saying things like, the only difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney is that the statue never changes its position. That’s not positive! Not even to the statue. And it would be wrong to say that if you guess Ron Paul’s real name, he has to teach you how to spin straw into gold. I’m not going to do it. And I am not going to answer the gotcha question, am I interested in an open marriage? Though I am flattered that Newt Gingrich asked me.”

“Anybody who knows me knows that I have believed in the message of Herman Cain for several days now,” the comedian continued. “I want you to vote for Herman Cain. Because Herman Cain is me. … But mostly, I believe you should work for Herman Cain because he believes in hard work, the power of free markets, and he possesses the one thing I don’t think I will ever have: a place on the South Carolina primary ballot.”

“So it is my great honor to introduce to you the Her-man with the plan, the plan so fine they named it 9-9-9; the Mad Max of the flat tax; the Indiana Jones of opportunity zones; the Her-man, the Her-myth, my brother from another mother: Mr. Herman Cain!”

With that, Cain took the stage wearing is signature hat and sunglasses.

“Mr. Colbert could not get on the ballot; I could not get off the ballot,” Cain explained. “But there’s another thing that I have that Mr. Colbert does not have, which is why he drafted my image in order to do his run for president. He does not have my complexion perfection.”

After urging South Carolinians to not “waste” their votes on him, Cain went on to quote a song Donna Summers performed for the Pokémon movie: “Life can be a challenge. Life can seem impossible. It’s never easy when there’s so much on the line, but you can make a difference. There’s a mission just for you. Just look inside and you will find just what you can do.”

The former candidate followed that with a rendition of Donna Summer’s “Believe In Yourself.”

Watch this video from CNN, broadcast Jan. 19, 2012.

 
David Edwards
David Edwards
David Edwards has served as an editor at Raw Story since 2006. His work can also be found at Crooks & Liars, and he's also been published at The BRAD BLOG. He came to Raw Story after working as a network manager for the state of North Carolina and as as engineer developing enterprise resource planning software. Follow him on Twitter at @DavidEdwards.
 
 
 
 
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