Colbert: Treat your flu with crystal meth, it’s science!

By David Ferguson
Friday, November 16, 2012 8:48 EDT
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Doctor Colbert has your flu medication
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Thursday night on “The Colbert Report,” host Stephen Colbert discussed a study published in Medical Daily that suggests that crystal methamphetamine may fight the flu virus.

The host premiered a segment called “Cheating Death with Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA,” DFA standing for Doctorate of Fine Arts, which Colbert said means that he can give “pap smears to Georgia O’Keefe paintings.”  In the segment, he explored the surprising results of a clinical study conducted in Taiwan. Scientists there were trying to determine whether people using crystal meth would be more susceptible to influenza.

In fact, they found the opposite, that meth may have “flu-fighting properties.” Cells exposed to meth not only stopped influenza’s reproduction, but the cells became more resistant to invasion by flu viruses.

“No surprise,” Colbert said, “It’s feed a fever, starve a cold, lose-all-your-teeth a flu.”

It’s only fair, though, he said, “because meth is the reason you were sleeping outside naked in the first place.”

“Folks, the point is that science has determined that apart from brain damage, heart disease, severe weight loss, psychosis and destroying people’s lives, meth is good for you,” he concluded.

Watch the video, embedded via Comedy Central, below:

David Ferguson
David Ferguson
David Ferguson is an editor at Raw Story. He was previously writer and radio producer in Athens, Georgia, hosting two shows for Georgia Public Broadcasting and blogging at Firedoglake.com and elsewhere. He is currently working on a book.
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