Jon Stewart chastises John McCain: Does a war with Syria interrupt your video poker time?

By Arturo Garcia
Thursday, September 5, 2013 0:34 EDT
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Jon Stewart skewers McCain [YouTube]
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Jon Stewart took Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) to task on Wednesday over his infamous game of video poker during a Senate Foreign Relations Committee hearing, telling him he was better off playing the real thing.

“Is this possible global conflagration interrupting your video poker time?” Stewart mockingly asked McCain, pointing out that the senator has been pushing for the U.S. to attack Syria for a year, only to devote the moment to picking up an imaginary winning hand.

“You know what, Senator? Go,” Stewart said. “There’s a Rascal scooter and a bucket of quarters with your name on it over at the Golden Nugget. You could play all the video poker you want, 99-cent prime rib. Instead of playing pretend poker in the actual Senate, go to an actual casino and pretend you know what the government should do.”

Stewart also pointed out that the U.S. has tried seemingly everything with regards to the Middle East: dialogue (every 8 years or so), sanctions, explicit and not-so-explicit rewarding of coups.

“It’s like, even though we’re a superpower, we haven’t figured out that we don’t actually have superpowers,” Stewart said. “But we just keep jumping out of the building, thinking we’re gonna fly.”

But the real root of the problem, he surmised, was the drawing of imaginary boundaries by Great Britain following World War I, prompting a visit by “Sir Archibald Mapsalot III,” who didn’t seem interested in clarifying the situation. And after Stewart pointed out how his casual ignorance fueled instability in the region. “Archibald” (a mustache-wearing John Oliver) responded by getting his own phone out to play poker out of boredom.

“This is what real gentlemen do,” “Archibald” chided. “They play poker on their iPhones whenever they become inexplicably bored by something incredibly important.”

Watch Stewart take on both McCain and “Sir Archibald,” embedded below via Comedy Central:

Part One:

Part Two:

Arturo Garcia
Arturo Garcia
Arturo R. García is the managing editor at Racialicious.com. He is based in San Diego, California and has written for both print and broadcast media, including contributions to GlobalComment.com, The Root and Comment Is Free. Follow him on Twitter at @ABoyNamedArt
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