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Take The Alf Pen! The Alf Pen!

By Jesse Taylor
Tuesday, June 24, 2008 22:27 EDT

imageThe first thing that comes to mind when thinking of McCain’s $300 million electric engine prize is that if we’re willing to sock that much money away for it already, why not just spend the $300 million as startup costs for actually doing it rather than hold it in reserve as a token prize for our next gazillionaire?

My second thought is that if we were going to pursue a program like this, we need to go full force. $300 million for an enterprise needing billions to succeed and promising tens of billions when it does is eerily reminiscent of the insulting-yet-satisfying redemption rewards you got as a kid (or last week) from Chuck E. Cheese. Sure, you spent ten dollars to get enough tickets to get a $1.50 notebook and 30-cent pen, but dammit, it was still somehow worthwhile, because it was stuff. The money you get from the government has the right proportion of input-to-reward, but it lacks the sort of bubbly uselessness that propagates the entire idea.

I think we should have more useless prizes for otherwise good ideas. An Iron Man-branded defunct Bradley Tank for inventing cold fusion? Yes! HDTVs for planes that are 25% more fuel efficient? Damn right! Successful replanning of an entire metro area to reduce gas usage, pollution, and sprawl? You, my friend, get a Family Guy DVD box set. Season 2. Just Season 2.


By Jesse Taylor

Amy Sullivan writes one of her two articles again. This is the abortion one.


CA: father kills child to ‘get the demons out’

By pams

I just want to believe this man was high or mentally ill because the abuse this two-year-old baby was subjected to is beyond belief. Sergio Casian Aguiar, a 27-year-old grocery store worker in Stanislaus County who had never been in trouble with the law before, not only kicked his child…


The Cohen…It Does Nothing!

By Jesse Taylor

Richard Cohen is the dumbest motherfucker alive. After spending the first half of his column excoriating Obama for his rejection of public financing (again – a decision which, in our Elite Pundit world, was an utterly monumental blow to his credibility and for the people that are actually going to…


Dobbsy Loves Barry Obama

By Jesse Taylor

Yet more hilarity from the fundie crowd: Some have been taking issue with largely unnoticed comments made last year by Sen. Barack Obama declaring the U.S. is “no longer a Christian nation” but is also a nation of others, including Muslims and nonbelievers. Whaaaaa? “Whatever we once were, we’re no…



By Jesse Taylor

Oh, the beauty of unintentional truths: “Even if we did have only Christians in our midst, if we expelled every non-Christian from the United States of America, whose Christianity would we teach in the schools?” Obama said. “Would we go with James Dobson’s or Al Sharpton’s?” referring to the civil…


Care Bears Go To The Polls

By Jesse Taylor

I would have an easier time having faith in our media if it had even the most remote connection to reality.…


Fundie pastors thumb nose at tax-exemption laws to endorse from the pulpit

By pams

Here we go. These bible-beaters are planning to test the boundaries of their tax-exempt status. They feel they are entitled to make political endorsements directly to the sheeple in the pews — this is understandable because these “Christian” leaders are seeing power slipping from their grasp and they believe the…


The Endangered Puma

By Jesse Taylor

Rebecca Traitster lists twelve reasons why Clinton supporters are still angry. Some are valid, some are head-scratchers, some show a disturbing adherence to a cult of personality that seems far outsize to anything Clinton’s done or would likely do. But one thing heartens me is that no matter how angry…


I don’t just hate ladies, but men who I think act like ladies

By Amanda Marcotte
Monday, June 23, 2008 22:47 EDT

I just brought myself to read the public editor Clark Hoyt’s article about sexism and the Clinton campaign in the NY Times. I was pleasantly relieved to see that he singles out Maureen Dowd, fairly, as the most egregious offender. Even better, he just lets her nonsensical defenses of her…