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The Bomb Shit Doctrine

By Jesse Taylor
Monday, June 23, 2008 17:26 EDT
 

imageIt seems as if the basic neocon doctrine towards Iran is that it’s foolish to try anything more complex than bombing them, lest we get bombed first. Of course, if we bomb them, then they won’t bomb us back, because they’ll be double scared of bombing. But if we don’t bomb them, they’re going to bomb us, which will of course result in them being bombed, but somehow it’s a qualitatively different sort of bombing that they aren’t actually afraid of.

Perhaps the perfect rumination on this is from Jeffrey Goldberg’s May interview with John McCain:

JG: What do you think motivates Iran?

JM: Hatred. I don’t try to divine people’s motives. I look at their actions and what they say. I don’t pretend to be an expert on the state of their emotions. I do know what their nation’s stated purpose is, I do know they continue in the development of nuclear weapons, and I know that they continue to support terrorists who are bent on the destruction of the state of Israel. You’ll have to ask someone who engages in this psycho stuff to talk about their emotions.

There is no reason the potential leader of the free world should be saying anything this fucking stupid without benefit of severe intoxication. This is not, in fact, an answer that an adult gives to a serious question concerning the lives of thousands of people, but rambling designed to communicate posture and dominance. If your view of nations is something like a wildlife documentary on Animal Planet, I recommend you vote McCain Leader of the Pack. If he starts humping you to reassert himself, don’t say I didn’t warn you. The Wall Street Journal, following McCain’s lead, laments the overreliance on diplomacy that we’ve thus far used with regards to Iran, in much the same way I lament my overreliance on hundred dollar bills that I’ve thus far used with regards to filling my swimming pool. The specter of appeasement again arises, and it’s this that leads to what seems to be the ultimate point of bombing Iran.

Iraq was supposed to be war without remorse, showing the world the benefit of acting based off of instinct. Unfortunately, we went in not only underprepared and misinformed, we went in totally unaware of the geopolitical situation internal and external to the country (except that high-speed WMD pipeline to Syria that we never found). Years of war have left the American people tired of the war, tired of the doctrine and simply tired of its orchestrators. The newish idea is to try the same thing, except simpler and more targeted. Pick a spot, bomb it, and watch as Khamenei and Achmadinejad piss their flat-front Dockers in fear as they make rapid steps away from nuclear proliferation and regional destabilization. It’s the simplest rationale of failures, especially conservative ones – the problem wasn’t the idea, it was the execution.

Of course, when Russian and China go apeshit, it’ll be fun to see a President McCain telling them to stop acting like such whiny bitches. Neither of them has the capacity to do shit, right? Right?

Manhug McMaverick Rides Again

By Jesse Taylor

Not one, but two articles in which Obama is targeted, and McCain is given a pass despite his gross inconsistency on the exact matter at hand. First, Obama

 

NYT Mag interviews Charlie Crist: he hasn’t found ‘the right one’ for him

By pams

Ever since Florida Governor Charlie Crist helped ace Florida for John McCain, the rumors have been swirling that the tanned, dapper very single Crist is on the short list for VP. Unfortunately for Crist, there were already more rampant rumors already out there about his allegedly selectively padlocked closet door.…

 

Sanka-Sipping Liberal Elitists

By Jesse Taylor

The fact that everything is more expensive is forcing people to forgo their lattes. How will we identify our sneering elite? (Well, besides the sneers.) Whenever there’s a sharp rise in living costs like this, you can bet there will be a flood of rich little poor kids harangues to…

 

I Will Give Credence To Anything, Because I’m A Real ‘Murkin

By Jesse Taylor

Maybe I missed something spending three years toiling away in the salt mines of Ohio (I was miner of the month in September 2007!), but was there a point at which dictators and terrorists became credible communicators of their own intent and rationale? It’s understandable why right-wingers run to bullshit…

 

“Opt-Out” still a fantasy peddled in the male-owned press

By Amanda Marcotte

Mythago sent me an article from the WSJ that has almost the proper mournful tone in presenting the facts that the well-groomed, professional middle class of women are not actually giving it all up to be trophy wives in the numbers suggested by hopeful trend writers in the past few…

 

What Obama should have said

By auguste

“I salute the efforts that House Democrats have made in reaching across the aisle to restore our Constitution, but I have repeatedly said that I would support a filibuster on any FISA bill which included retroactive immunity, and I will. I will work with Senate colleagues to ensure that the…

 

Is it possible Obama’s FISA “reversal isn’t that bad?

By auguste

This is not a “defend Obama at any cost” post: Let it be known that, from my point of view, the baseline answer to the titular question is “no, it’s not.” Obama promised as recently as February to support a filibuster on any bill including retroactive immunity. Several bloggers, including…

 

Why Liberal Media Bias Is Fake

By Jesse Taylor

Because no matter what happens, the media always picks up on two narratives: can people trust the Democrat, and how does the Democrat stop people from trusting the Republican? With Gore, it was the NASCAR Dads and the beer test, with Kerry it was security moms and the national security…

 

You’ll be satisfied with our level of service, oral and otherwise

By Amanda Marcotte
Sunday, June 22, 2008 23:11 EDT

Hat tip.…

 
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