Jesus' General never lets me down. From his missive to Focus on the Anus's Stuart Shepard, whose video has probably seen more hits since it was yanked from Daddy D's site:

As much as I love your idea of using the power of imprecatory prayer to ask God to deluge Barack Obama's acceptance speech with a vengeful rebuke of hellish lightening and stinging rain, it's not an adequate response to the threat he and his followers represent. After all, this is a man who is hell bent on taking our white women. God's response should be commensurate with the crime.

Let us, instead, ask God to punish Obama and his followers with the same curse He levied upon the ancient Philistines of Ashdod, Gath, and Bethshemesh. Yes, let us ask the Lord to smite them with hemorrhoids in their secret parts.

You have to click over for the sign off -- it's precious.