Ladies and gentlemen, Newt Gingrich:


"There’s no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate."

True story: one time, I was working on the Fourth of July, and an orgy spontaneously broke out on my penis.

So, the main question is whether Newt Gingrich giving the exact quote South Park would use to mock him will inoculate him against the fact that he's a terrible human being. Wait, no; the main question here is why this is the same conversation we've been having since 1996.