Children Should Be Starving And Not Heard
When a kid goes to a public school and gets a cheeseburger for lunch, it's remarkably difficult to know how, exactly, the government is completely and utterly wrong to do so. Is it nanny-state control over the kids, feeding them food against (with, but whatever) their parents' wishes? Or is it the government causing the very obesity crisis that Michelle Obama is seeking to prevent by shaking her well-toned finger in the faces of our nation's seven-year olds before Sasha and Malia stick an ether-laced lettuce leaf over their faces?
It's both, dummies.
Donnie Surber says that this step is necessary, because private industry isn't making kids fat, it's government acting in loco parentis for a nation of alcoholic dumbasses:
The government — not McDonald’s — leads to childhood obesity.
As liberals continue to demonize McDonald’s for all the fat tub-o-lard poor kids we have these days, the fact remains that the government is the main culprit.
Poor children’s parents get food stamps without any restrictions on using them to buy soda, candy and potato chips.
Poor children get free school breakfasts — year round.
Poor children get free school lunches — year round.
To combat obesity, first lady Michelle Obama set up a program to give poor children free school dinners — year round — with all the second helpings they want.
If the government is going to provide food — if my tax bucks are going to subsidize parents so they can spend their money on beer or whatever — then dammit the government should provide quality food and not corn dogs.
And if the brats won’t eat it, fine. Let’s quit kowtowing to those on welfare. The mooches don’t like it? Tough. Beggars can’t be choosers.
You have to love a man who turns into a big tough motherfucker on some grade school children he's never met. Next thing you know, he'll mean mug the door outside of a YMCA daycare. But just the door.
On the other hand, the government should be feeding kids crap, because according to Helen Whalen Cohen, to do otherwise would violate the inviolable right of parents to not have their children eat gay shit:
As it turns out, removing chocolate milk from the menu was only the beginning for Los Angeles government schools. Who here thinks that kids are going to eat spinach tortellini in butternut squash after their chicken nuggets are taken away?
Sophistication? In an elementary school lunch menu? If I were a parent, I wouldn't want my kids going anywhere near sushi rolls in a school cafeteria. One more example of (likely well-intentioned) top down planning that can't go anywhere good.
The government should be feeding children chocolate milk and corn dogs (or chocolate corn dogs), because feeding them fresh food removes the normal parental expectation – bred by the government, ironically – that everything on a plate should be brown or yellow.
Potential solution: tempura rolls. With sake bombs for the welfare-dependent parents, of course.