On Thursday night’s edition of “The Colbert Report,” host Stephen Colbert took cable news networks to task for jumping the gun and mistakenly announcing that the Supreme Court had struck down the bulk of the Affordable Care Act.
On Thursday morning, as the world looked on, both CNN and Fox News announced exactly the wrong news when they reported the Supreme Court’s ruling on the Affordable Care Act, President Obama’s signature piece of domestic legislation. When copies of the decision were handed out and Justice Roberts began to read the opinion, two of the biggest news organizations on the planet scrambled to announce the result, and in the process, got it wrong.
Colbert played clips of Fox News’s Bill Hemmer, CNN’s Kate Bolduan and Fox Business Channel’s tory wonderboy Stuart Varney breathlessly reporting that the court had overturned the individual mandate, the centerpiece of the legislation.
“The individual mandate has been struck down,” Fox Business anchor Stuart Varney portentously intoned, “The individual mandate has. Been. Struck. Down.”
“No. It. Has. Not,” Colbert shot back, “You. Suck. At. News.”
“Evidently, folks,” he said, “and I didn’t know this, evidently, there’s more to a Supreme Court ruling than the first page!”
Then he played clips of all the same people having to walk back the news they’d broken not ten minutes before. The camera cut back to a frozen-faced, flabbergasted Colbert. He threw a glass of water into his own face, pulled out a toaster and stuck a fork in it, then leaned over while a third arm appeared from under the desk and slapped him.
Then the host showed the audience what would happen if we took a similar approach to some great works of literature.
Watch the clip, embedded via Comedy Central, below:
Nancy Pelosi roasts Mark Zuckerberg for ‘pandering’ to Trump and his ‘silly’ tantrums
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi on Thursday mocked Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg for his efforts to appease President Donald Trump's criticisms of major social media companies.
During a press conference, Pelosi said that Zuckerberg "just panders" to Trump in an effort to preserve his business model, which she described as a platform for people to "misrepresent facts" without consequence.
"They knew during the 2016 elections that the Russians were engaged in foul play," she said. "They knew, because they saw where the money was coming from!"
She then turned her attention to Trump's new executive order that will reportedly open up tech platforms to more lawsuits.
Pennsylvania Dem unloads on GOPers who pushed to reopen as they hid colleague’s COVID-19 infection
Pennsylvania state Rep. Brian Sims (D) lashed out at Republican lawmakers who remained silent after testing positive for COVID-19.
Democrats this week accused Republicans of withholding information after Rep. Andrew Lewis (R) tested positive for the virus.
"It's been a week, perhaps longer, that House Republican leadership knew that at least one of their members had tested positive for COVID-19," Sims explained in a Facebook post. "But they didn't go on quarantine until they were done serving alongside us, especially those of us that serve on the State Government Committee."
‘I have no time for this’: The View’s Meghan McCain blows up GOP conspiracies about voting by mail
"The View" co-host Meghan McCain broke with fellow Republicans who claim voting by mail is rife with fraud.
President Donald Trump and other GOP elected officials warn that efforts to make absentee ballots more easily available will allow Democrats to steal the election, but McCain said that hasn't been the case in her home state.
"That's not accurate," McCain said. "Arizona has voted red every election since 1953, and as Sunny [Hostin] pointed out a few shows ago, 70 percent of Arizonans vote in by absentee ballot or by mail. This is all just trafficking in complete and utter inaccuracies and falsehoods, and it's Thursday. We've had a long week, and I have no time for this."