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Colbert to CNN and Fox: ‘You suck at news’

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On Thursday night’s edition of “The Colbert Report,” host Stephen Colbert took cable news networks to task for jumping the gun and mistakenly announcing that the Supreme Court had struck down the bulk of the Affordable Care Act.

On Thursday morning, as the world looked on, both CNN and Fox News announced exactly the wrong news when they reported the Supreme Court’s ruling on the Affordable Care Act, President Obama’s signature piece of domestic legislation. When copies of the decision were handed out and Justice Roberts began to read the opinion, two of the biggest news organizations on the planet scrambled to announce the result, and in the process, got it wrong.

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Colbert played clips of Fox News’s Bill Hemmer, CNN’s Kate Bolduan and Fox Business Channel’s tory wonderboy Stuart Varney breathlessly reporting that the court had overturned the individual mandate, the centerpiece of the legislation.

“The individual mandate has been struck down,” Fox Business anchor Stuart Varney portentously intoned, “The individual mandate has. Been. Struck. Down.”

“No. It. Has. Not,” Colbert shot back, “You. Suck. At. News.”

“Evidently, folks,” he said, “and I didn’t know this, evidently, there’s more to a Supreme Court ruling than the first page!”

Then he played clips of all the same people having to walk back the news they’d broken not ten minutes before. The camera cut back to a frozen-faced, flabbergasted Colbert. He threw a glass of water into his own face, pulled out a toaster and stuck a fork in it, then leaned over while a third arm appeared from under the desk and slapped him.

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Then the host showed the audience what would happen if we took a similar approach to some great works of literature.

Watch the clip, embedded via Comedy Central, below:

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2020 Election

Watch Kamala Harris laugh out loud when 60 Minutes asks her if Trump is racist

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Sen. Kamala Harris (D-CA) laughed when asked if President Donald Trump was racist during a 60 Minutes interview that aired Sunday evening on CBS.

"Do you think the president is racist?" Nora O'Donnell asked.

"Yes, I do," Harris replied, with a laugh. "Yeah, I do."

"You can look at a pattern that goes back to him questioning the identity of the first Black president of the United States," she said, referring to the racist "birther" conspiracy theory he pushed against Barack Obama.

"You can look at Charlottesville, when there were peaceful protesters and on the other side neo-Nazis and he talks about fine people on either side," she continued. "Calling Mexicans rapists and criminals? His first order of business was to institute a Muslim ban?"

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2020 Election

Fox News report crushes Hunter Biden smear after network investigation ‘found no role for Joe Biden’

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A Fox News investigation "found no role for Joe Biden" in the business dealing of his son, Hunter, the network said on Sunday.

The admission was made by Fox News reporter Griff Jenkins.

Jenkins explained that the news organization had been provided documents by Tony Bobulinski, Hunter Biden's former business partner.

"You're talking about a business venture with the Chinese energy company in 2017 at a time when Joe Biden was not vice president," Jenkins explained. "But Fox's review of Bobulinski's documents, which were given to us, found no role for Joe Biden in that business venture."

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2020 Election

Trump voter tells CBS she doesn’t wear a mask because ‘teeny-tiny’ virus is ‘so small’

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A voter who supports President Donald Trump's handling of COVID-19 told CBS News on Sunday that she does not wear a mask because the virus is too small.

During a panel discussion with voters on Face the Nation, host Margaret Brennan asked which panelist wore face masks.

"Beth, you don't wear a mask?" Brennan asked one of the voters.

"I do when I'm in public spaces where they insist that you do," Beth replied. "But otherwise, no."

"And so when you hear the statistics that are rattled off by the CDC director, you hear Dr. Fauci say wearing a mask could really stop the spread, why do you doubt that?" Brennan pressed.

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