In keeping with the spirit of the upcoming spooky scary Halloween 'holiday' , former Vice President, destroyer of worlds, and still moving undead thing Dick Cheney has arisen from his Jackson crypt Hole  to plug his book that is all about his refusal to just die already fergawdssakes, and to also talk about the Tea Party and  his Not-Lesbian daughter's primary Senate race against Mike Enzi;  the one friend in Wyoming whom Dick has yet to shoot in the face.

So. Much. Cheney. The First Family of Wyoming. So let's get started:

It seems that Jesus, who has been attempting to send Cheney to hell call him home since 1978, failed once again because Dick Cheney is Pure Concentrated Evil and he is also one of those awful terrible things that will never ever go away like herpes or Arsenio Hall:

Just three years ago, the former vice president was within hours of dying from heart failure, saved by urgent surgery to implant a left ventricular assist device with an external battery that kept him alive while he waited for a heart transplant. After 20 months, the call came late one night last year that he finally had reached the top of the organ list. There was a donor heart available for him.

Now, at age 72, he looks strikingly younger and more robust than he did when he left the White House and the public eye in 2009 — at that point struggling with more serious deterioration of his heart and health than was generally recognized at the time.

You may recall that it was reported back on March 25th, 2012 that Cheney had received a heart transplant.

I bet the Tea Party totally loves Dick Cheney (cuz he's white and old... just like them!) even when armed with the knowledge that Cheney, who has a net worth of about $90 million, has sucked deeply at the government socialist medicine teat to the tune of about $1 million alone just for his slightly-used  refurbished heart:

...  It’s a pretty intense procedure. And it, like a transplant and many other medical advances, isn’t cheap. In fact, the average initial cost of a heart transplant, with drugs and post-surgery care, including catheterizations and scans, can be close to a million dollars.

Fortunately for Cheney, the cost of his health care was covered by taxpayers. In addition to health insurance provided through the government for Cheney’s years of service, Cheney, like millions of other Americans was eligible for Medicare benefits when he turned 65. In most cases, if you are retired and have Medicare, as well as health plan coverage from a former employer, Medicare pays first. The group health plan coverage pays second. Either way, it’s tax dollars at work.

At least those tax dollars weren't wasted on vaccinations for at risk kids because those vaccinations don't work anyway. Just ask Jenny McCarthy.

But here is Dick Cheney giving some  Tea Party love:

Former Vice President Dick Cheney downplayed the rift created within his Republican party by the Tea Party, calling it a positive influence.

“It’s an uprising, in part, and the good thing is it’s taken place with in the Republican party. I don’t see it as a negative. I think it’s much better to have that kind of ferment and turmoil and change in the Republican party than it would be to have it outside,” he said Monday on TODAY.

And , since we were talking about terrible women like Jenny McCarthy, this brings us to the campaign of Not-Lesbian daughter Elizabeth "Liz" "Not-Lesbian" Cheney (also known affectionately as 'Baby Dick' and 'Daddy's Little Deferment') who is also a terrible person.

Cheney said his daughter’s decision to launch a campaign to unseat U.S. Sen. Mike Enzi of Wyoming was “partly motivated” by concerns expressed by Tea Party members. Asked if he planned to help Liz campaign, Cheney said “I’ll do all that I can but probably the best thing I can do is stay out of the way.

Like he just didn't do, but instead managed to link her campaign to a group of people who are slightly less popular than shitting yourself at a wedding. And it's your own wedding. And you're the bride.

Well played. Dick.

We shall add this to the string of Liz Cheney hits since she decided to challenge Mike Enzi for his Senate seat, and then proceeded to call him a doddering old man who probably has Alzheimers or some kind of degenerative brain cancer or something.

The list includes:

  • Attempting to get around being accused of being a carpetbagger by lying about her residency for a fishing license... and  then blaming the clerk.
  • Her mom Lynne, famous  lesbian potboilers author , going Mama Grizzly on Alan Simpson - the only Wyomianianianing America knows about -  and then lying about it.
  • Sister Mary Cheney (the Lesbian One) getting into a ShoutyFacebook war with her  over non-opposite marriage.
  • Then being attacked for being too soft on non-opposite marriage.

So there you have it. The Cheney clan, one and all,  are just like the Kennedys.

If the Kennedys were the Manson family.