Real Time host Bill Maher dimmed the lights on Friday and gave his audience a taste of what the Harlequin romance novel line might become now that it's been acquired by conservative billionaire Rupert Murdoch's News Corp.
Maher also expressed skepticism at News Corp's claim that Harlequin would be managed independently of Murdoch's other operations.
"I think their conservative agenda is gonna get in the mix," he said, producing a copy of what he jokingly called the first entry in the new series: Love's Fair & Balanced Desire, the tastefully torrid tale of "homeschooled virgin brain nurse" Rachel Winterhaven's coupling with widower Dr. Dax Ransom, whose wife "had died in the War on Christmas."
Maher opened with a scene describing the couple building toward a moment of fiscally-responsible passion.
"He fumbled with the wrapper of a condom until she stopped him," Maher narrated. "'Don't bother,' she smiled. 'My body has a way of shutting that whole thing down. Now drill, baby, drill.'"
However, Maher said, Rachel had a secret of her own: an illicit affair with Hector the Latino orderly who was "dark and full of a powerful energy -- like clean coal."
"'It's true,' she thought," Maher said. "'Mexicans are willing to take jobs Americans won't.'"
Watch Maher indulge his romantic side, as posted online on Friday, below.