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Jon Stewart: World is so ‘f*cked up,’ Germany and Cleveland are the happiest places on Earth

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Jon Stewart returned to the Daily Show after his vacation, he said, to find a world gone mad.

“Things are so f*cked up in our world, that the two happiest places in the world are Germany and Cleveland,” he fretted.

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While the Germans are celebrating their World Cup triumph and Cleveland is happy to get LeBron James back, Stewart said, seemingly every other place on the planet is tied up in catastrophes. In California, he noted, thousands of Central American immigrants have been confronted by protesters telling them, “Go back to Mexico” or saying, “Jesus would not break the law.”

“You mean radical destroyer of the status quo Jesus?” Stewart asked skeptically. “Barging into temples, overthrowing tables Jesus? Breaking the law was kind of his thing. In fact, he didn’t just walk on water, he jaywalked on water. That actually, if I know my Biblical history, is where the ‘j’ in ‘jaywalking’ came from.”

Even in the Middle East, Stewart said, the looming threat of the militant group ISIS overrunning Iraq still didn’t mean “catastrophe classic” was any closer to ending in Israel and Gaza.

While Israelis are able to download an app that warns them of an imminent attack, he explained, Gaza residents are alerted via “warning bombings” in their neighborhoods, followed by a 3-minute evacuation warning.

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“Evacuate to where?” Stewart asked. “Have you f*cking seen Gaza? Israel blocked this border. Egypt blocked this border. What, are they supposed to swim for it?”

Watch Stewart’s commentary, as posted online on Monday, below.


Jon Stewart 071414 by lookatmyshirt

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Enjoy this piece?

… then let us make a small request. Like you, we here at Raw Story believe in the power of progressive journalism — and we’re investing in investigative reporting as other publications give it the ax. Raw Story readers power David Cay Johnston’s DCReport, which we've expanded to keep watch in Washington. We’ve exposed billionaire tax evasion and uncovered White House efforts to poison our water. We’ve revealed financial scams that prey on veterans, and efforts to harm workers exploited by abusive bosses. We’ve launched a weekly podcast, “We’ve Got Issues,” focused on issues, not tweets. Unlike other news sites, we’ve decided to make our original content free. But we need your support to do what we do.

Raw Story is independent. You won’t find mainstream media bias here. We’re not part of a conglomerate, or a project of venture capital bros. From unflinching coverage of racism, to revealing efforts to erode our rights, Raw Story will continue to expose hypocrisy and harm. Unhinged from corporate overlords, we fight to ensure no one is forgotten.

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Trump has been ‘insulated’ by his wealth to never have to learn from his mistakes: biographer

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President Donald Trump's inherited wealth has meant he's never had to learn from his mistakes, Trump biographer Tim O'Brien told MSNBC's Brian Williams on Thursday.

"Bloomberg Opinion writer and our next guest Tim O’Brien writes today, 'Yes, of course, you need a certain kind of appalling narcissism to be comfy promoting yourself as heaven-sent in a televised press briefing and as a deity on Twitter. It’s doubly unhinged when you’re doing this as president,'" Williams said. "He goes on 'The Trump of the past few weeks is the same disordered figure of the past several decades with, I suspect, a big dollop of something new blended in: unbridled and unmanageable panic.'"

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The Russian Federation and the People's Republic of China are both rooting for President Donald Trump to win re-election in 2020, a New York Times columnist argued on MSNBC on Thursday.

Thomas Friedman was interviewed by Lawrence O'Donnell on "The Last Word."

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Trump is ‘not a stable genius’: GOP strategist says the president ‘doesn’t remember who and where he is’

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President Donald Trump's mental fitness is lacking, a top Republican strategist explained on "The Last Word" with Lawrence O'Donnell.

Rick Wilson, the author of the 2018 bestselling book Everything Trump Touches Dies: A Republican Strategist Gets Real About the Worst President Ever, blasted the commander-in-chief.

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