So the guys at the NRA were just sitting around talkin’ ’bout guns — or ‘shooting the shit’ as they like to say — with some guys representing their gun manufacturer overlords, and someone moaned that they were running out of demographic groups to target and convince to purchase their wares. Undoubtedly an intern walking by heard them, poked his head through the conference room doorway, and said, “You guys should totally sell guns to blind people.”
Then he went back to his regular job, sorting NRA mail, looking for checks from people sending in a portion of their disability benefits to keep government tyranny out of their lives.
Meanwhile, back in the conference room, a drum-roll of tumescent penises was heard as they thumped upward beneath the conference room table in joyous boners at the idea of selling to this hitherto neglected group of other-abled Vision-Impaired-Americans — not counting close-your-eyes-squeeze-the-trigger-let-God-sort-them-out Christine Jones of Arizona.
Deciding to float a trial balloon suggesting that blind people should be strapped, locked, and loaded before they go out in public, the NRA turned to studchunk and guy who was too late to get in on some that sweet Blackwater overseas homicide, Dom Raso.
Preceding Raso’s lunatic rant, the NRA included a disclaimer stating, “The following video contains the opinion of an NRA News commentator and does not necessarily reflect the views of other individuals or organizations.”
That is the NRA’s way of saying, “Wicked-ass stupid shit ahead. We think it’s nuts too, but you know: 1st Amendment and shit. Whattaya gonna do, right? Also, buy more guns. Kthanxbai.”
Every law-abiding blind individual should be able to have whatever guns they want. And if you disagree with that statement, if you haven’t thought it all the way through, you don’t take your rights seriously enough. Do you think because they’re blind, they’re going to start shooting in every direction and kill everyone.
I don’t necessarily think that, but I do know that a bullet leaves the barrel of a handgun at about 1,200ft per second and it’s favorite way of stopping is by hitting something or someone. It is very indiscriminate that way. It is already hard enough to hit something with a handgun, even if you are trained and have better than average vision. A report issued in 2008 said that New York City policeman hit their target “roughly 34 percent of the time,” which is a great batting average for a baseball player, but not so much for lethal lead slugs flying willy-nilly about, looking for a place to rest.
But hey, Dom, convince us:
It’s been proven that people who lack vision have an increased awareness of their hearing and spatial surroundings.
Yeah, okay, um…. this isn’t’ exactly a bat plucking an insect out of the early evening Austin sky. While the shooter’s hearing may be a bit enhanced, the bullet, once it leaves the gun has a mind, but not ears, of it’s own.
Dom then invokes the ‘George Zimmerman attacked by his stalking victim with Skittles & iced tea’ defense:
Do you think you need to see where you’re shooting if someone’s on top of you trying to kill or rape you while their hands are slowly squeezing your neck and they’re yelling, “I’m going to kill you”?
I’m going to go with, “Yes, Dom. You do need to see where you are shooting even at close quarters and you have no idea exactly how your assailant is positioned, and you are struggling and the guns is now waving around with rounds traveling everywhere despite your enhanced super-hearing powers. Yeah, this is a bad idea, Dom. It’s really stupid. Please shut up.”
Waving the flag and flaunting a braille-edition of the Constitution (not really) Raso concludes, “Individual rights are too important to not think them all the way through.”
Not thinking this one through seems to be the order of the day, or maybe it’s just the NRA proposing something really outrageous in the hopes of getting something a little closer to their hearts…. like mounting sidewinder missiles on the backs of therapy dogs.
That’s gotta be worth some big bucks from Raytheon and PETA is pretty ineffective when it comes to push-back, anyway…
Watch the video below from the NRA: