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The 12 Days of Duggarville: Absurd things the insane right-wing Christian cult have given us

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Michelle and JimBob Duggar, mom and pop of the Quiverfull mega-family featured on TLC’s “19 Kids & Counting” reality TV show, have been in the spotlight recently due to a petition which has gathered 180,000+ signatures demanding that The Learning Channel cancel the program in protest of the Duggar’s “LGBTQ fear-mongering.” A counter petition sponsored by Duggar supporters has collected almost 210,000 signatures from among the religious right.

With all the publicity the Duggar family has garnered over their anti-gay activism, now is a good time to educate readers to the myriad other ways the Duggars’ extreme fundamentalist Christian worldview actually harms families. With this background in mind, the spiritual abuse survivors at No Longer Quivering bring you: The 12 Days of Christmas: Duggar Style!

On the 1st Day of Christmas, Michelle Duggar sent to me … an Arkansas anti-gay travesty.

(Duggar joined the effort to overturn [a non-discrimination] law in late summer, recording robocalls that went out to every phone in Fayetteville in which she described LGBT people as a threat to the community.)

On the 2nd Day of Christmas, Jill and Jessa sent to me … 2 feuding sisters double-dating.

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(Maybe Jill is jealous that she’s no longer the only Duggar girl who’s allowed to kiss boys.)

On the 3rd Day of Christmas, People Magazine sent to me … 3 Surprising Things NOT at Jessa Duggar’s Wedding.

(No white dress, no wedding cake, and no first kiss for the crowd.)

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On the 4th Day of Christmas, Josh & Anna Duggar sent to me … 4 babies in 6 years!

(With number four on the way, many are wondering if the D.C. Duggars are planning on having a double-digit clan of their own.)

On the 5th Day of Christmas, the Duggar girls sent to me … FIVE P-U-R-I-T-Y Rings!

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(The Duggar daughters are doing their darndest to make “courtship” culture cool.)

On the 6th Day of Christmas, Jessa Duggar sent to me … 6 million Jewish Holocaust victims compared to abortion on Instagram.

(Regardless of how one feels about the morality of abortion though, comparing it to one of the greatest horrors in modern history is insensitive and clueless, to say the least.)

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On the 7th Day of Christmas, Michelle Duggar sent to me … 7 Basic Needs of a Husband.

(No. 1 secret? “Say yes to sex, even when you’re tired.”)

On the 8th Day of Christmas, the Duggars sent to me … 8 bible-approved spousal abuse tactics.

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(When the very definition of perfect love is sacrificing your children and martyring yourself, there is no place for emotionally healthy concepts like boundaries, consent, equality, and mutuality.)

On the 9th Day of Christmas, the Duggar Family sent to me … 9 submissive helpmeets.

(Girls are born for one and only one reason: to serve a husband.)

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On the 10th Day of Christmas, the Duggar Family sent to me … 10 patriarchs-in-training.

(“The Tenets of Biblical Patriarch,”… asserts that God is male, and explicitly not female; that the human male is the “image and glory of God in terms of authority, while the woman is the glory of man.”)

On the 11th Day of Christmas, JimBob sent to me … an unwelcomed baby.

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(“She broke away from everything his family represents, so viewers shouldn’t expect any televised trips to visit this in-law.”)

On the 12th Day of Christmas, Jana Duggar sent to me … the Stay-At-Home-Daughter reality.

(For most of my life I was utterly convinced that staying at home was what I wanted, a personal conviction that I had. It took me six years and two degrees in order for me to fully realize that it wasn’t something I ever would have chosen for myself if I’d been truly allowed to consider any other option.– Samantha Field, Defeating the Dragons)

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On the 13th Day of Christmas … yes, we’re still counting … ‘cuz we are doing this Duggar-style! …

On the 13th Day of Christmas, TLC sent to me … 13 Parenting Tips.

(#1 Have your teenagers raise your toddlers: Call it a buddy system. Call it free babysitting. Call it nanny training for chipper teenagers. The practice is the same: Assign the smaller kids to the older kids for basic stuff like tooth-brushing and shoe tying.)

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On the 14th Day of Christmas, Michelle Duggar sent to me .. NOBODY dancing!

(We believe, as a personal family conviction — this isn’t something we judge anybody else on — but we believe that dancing can stir up sensual desires, especially in guys, that cannot be righteously fulfilled…we just don’t believe it’s something that our family wants to get involved in doing.)

On the 15th Day of Christmas, JimBob & Michelle sent to me … Duggar missionaries in Central America.

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(Our children get an understanding that the way we live here is not the way most people in the world live.)

On the 16th Day of Christmas, Jessa Duggar (Seewald) sent to me … her homophobic father-in-law.

(You might remember Michael Seewald as the man who labeled Jessa Duggar’s critics “Hitler’s doppelgangers” after they expressed their disappointment in her for sharing an Instagram post that compared abortion to the Holocaust.)

On the 17th Day of Christmas, the Duggars sent to me … a sex-predator cover-up.

(Is it any surprise that a subculture that promises absolute control over women will attract men who want to dominate and hurt women? )

On the 18th Day of Christmas, Reality TV sent to me … Duggar competition.

(America, prepare to get to know the Bates family a whole lot better in the new year when their new series, Bringing Up Bates, premieres Jan. 1 on UP.)

On the 19th Day of Christmas, the Duggars sent to me … 19 Kids & Counting who need deprogramming.

(Hopefully one day soon, the J-kids will discover No Longer Quivering’s Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network … let the healing begin.)


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