Stephen Colbert mocked Jeb Bush’s attempt to reboot his floundering presidential campaign with a snazzy new slogan and e-book — called “Reply All.”
“That’s a great way to show that you’re done making mistakes, by naming your book after something people do by accident,” Colbert said.
He said the GOP also-ran seems like he’s “sleepwalking” — although he conceded that approach seems to be working for Ben Carson.
Colbert said Bush’s new slogan, “Jeb can fix it,” is about as reassuring as a pilot announcing just before takeoff that he does, in fact, know how to land a plane.
He then showed a sad video of Bush insisting that he’s a fighter by boasting that he eats nails upon waking up, and then sitting down to breakfast.
Colbert said he believes Bush eats nails — although he took that to mean biting his nails in terror upon realizing he’s still stuck running for president.
“I can imagine his address to Congress,” Colbert said, adopting some of Bush’s campaign assurances. “‘The state of our union is — look, I know it’s got to get better, right? I mean, come on. It has to, right? Don’t underestimate America, but I hope you do, because I eat nails for breakfast, and God bless you and may God bless — you know what? I’ll see myself out.”
Watch the entire segment posted online by The Late Show With Stephen Colbert: