Trevor Noah said North Carolina's anti-LGBT bill shows just how poorly thought-out hate really is -- because he wondered how the state would enforce its anti-trans bathroom ban.
"Now they expect people to carry their birth certificates to every public restroom in (their) state," Noah said. "Now, if I want to use the bathroom, I have to be like, 'Oh, I didn't bring my birth certificate, let me go home and get my birth certificate, I go home and get my birth certificate, and then I'm like, 'Wait, I could have just peed at home.'"
He said North Carolina's anti-trans "bathroom bill" feels sinister, but he said Kansas had taken their anti-LGBT bill to the next level by including a $2,500 "bounty" paid to students who encounter a trans person in the restroom.
"Are you shitting me?" Noah said. "Schools in Kansas are teaching kids the wrong things. Snitches get stitches, not riches."
Noah said Kansas students should team up with transgender classmates and scam the state.
"You know what you guys should do?" he said. "Make friends with a transgender kid, and then every time you go to the bathroom together, you're making $1,250 a pop. You're both making money, and you don't have any bigotry. Twelve-fifty each -- that's enough money to get you the f*ck out of Kansas, Dorothy."
Noah questioned how the state had enough money to pay the anti-trans bounties, thanks to Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback's budget-wrecking conservative tax policies.
"You're broke -- so basically these bills and laws are prejudiced, cruel, unnecessary and they couldn't be enforced, anyway," Noah said.
He said "America's most important people, corporations," are speaking out against the bills by refusing to do business in states that enact them, and the governors of three states have ordered non-essential state employees not to travel to North Carolina on official business.
"A travel advisory? Damn, North Carolina -- you realize they're treating you like you've got Ebola," Noah said. "And it makes sense. If you think about it, bigotry's a lot like Ebola -- only difference is, the shit comes out of your mouth instead of your ass."
Watch the entire segment posted online by Comedy Central: