Stephen Colbert admitted on Thursday night’s “Late Show” that he and his staff celebrated “St. Comey Day” by watching TV for hours and writing down jokes as fast as they possibly could.
He began by saying that Comey’s testimony was so riveting that he anticipates Comey will soon publish his own children’s book about President Donald Trump’s Russia scandal called “James and the Guilty Orange.”
Comey explained that he didn’t “buy it” that he was fired for the email investigation for Secretary Hillary Clinton and claimed it didn’t make sense because of “all the time and all the water that had gone under that bridge.”
“Oh! I remember that bridge,” Colbert exclaimed. “I think it’s the one they threw Hillary off of to see if she was a witch. And remember, she lost the election so that means –” Colbert paused to show a clip from “Monty Python’s Holy Grail” in which the commoners chant “Witch!” He noted those in the video were the U.S. Supreme Court.
Colbert also paused hearing Comey’s strange description that there was “no fuzz” on his warning about the Russians hacking the United States.
“There it is. The Russians hacked us and the only way there could be less fuzz on this is if the Brazilians hacked us,” Colbert joked.
Comey admitted in his testimony that when Trump invited him to dinner he was forced to break a date with his wife. “In retrospect, I love spending time with my wife, I wish I’d been there that night,” Comey said.
“On the plus side, if you hadn’t gone to dinner with him that night, you wouldn’t have so much time to spend with your wife now,” Colbert noted.
Colbert closed by mocking Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) for his bizarre and confusing line of questioning during the morning’s hearing.
“He proved he’s a maverick when it comes to being able to understand him,” Colbert said.
He played the long and convoluted questioning from McCain. Comey then struggled to understand what exactly the senior senator was asking. “With respect to Secretary — I’m not — I’m a little confused, Senator,” Comey said.
“Not as much as he is,” Colbert said.
Colbert was impressed Trump managed to keep from tweeting but assumed it was because Reince Priebus and Steve Bannon were playing “keep-away” with Trump’s phone.