Daily Show: 'Cheney cyborgs' to blame for 'doublespeak'
The Daily Show's Jon Stewart on Wednesday raised questions over Vice President Dick Cheney's conflicting statements on Iraq troop withdrawals and went on to present a satirical theory on the conflicting "versions" of Vice President Cheney.
In one segment, Stewart played a clip in which Cheney is questioned by Jonathan Karl of ABC News about the message sent by Britain's decision to withdraw its forces from Iraq. Cheney responds, "I look at it and what I see is an affirmation of the fact that there are parts of Iraq where things are going pretty well." Stewart then ponders whether the same wouldn't be true, then, for the withdrawal of U.S. forces.
Stewart then turns to Daily Show correspondent John Oliver, who asserts that Cheney's conflicting statements are a result of Cheney not being human but instead a fleet of "cyborgs" stationed around the world.
"The Cheney-XR7 is programmed to convince us that we are safer and winning the war on terror, while the Cheney-VR Turbo will stop at nothing to keep us in a perpetual state of submissive fear," said Oliver. "The Cheney-BF3000 loves his lesbian daughter, but John, do not get her near the Dick Cheney Omega-8. He thinks she's an abomination."