We must wake from this fawning nightmare even if Trump cannot

Perhaps you’ve seen the scene in Pyongyang when North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un convenes his cabinet of sycophants.

The generals and ministers rise as one, their faces frozen in practiced reverence, eyes locked on their Supreme Leader. No one dares look away. No one fidgets.

The ritualized praise flows like liturgy — each man competing to prove his loyalty, his devotion, his willingness to suspend all independent thought in service of the Dear Leader’s infallibility. Blink at the wrong moment, and you risk death.

We seem to be getting there.

Trump convened another one of his grotesque Cabinet-on-camera meetings Tuesday — produced by the master of Detached-From-Reality TV — and this one was quite a bit like the last one on Aug. 26. Except that jarred a fair amount of sensibilities in the chattering class. Now we seem to be used to it.

No need to dwell on the media angle. That ship has sailed.

But in case you missed it, behold the sweet sounds of sycophancy with which members of the Cabinet of the United States government abandoned their souls, in service of the leader of the band.

Lee Zeldin, EPA Administrator:
“If you were to ask me what I’m grateful for, whether it’s a Thanksgiving, it’s a Christmas, Hanukkah, New Year’s, any time of year the fact that this president, after four years serving in office, he could have just left it in the rear-view mirror and went on to really enjoy retirement. But he is willing to take a bullet for all of you tuning in at home because he believes in this flag, our freedom, our liberties and to save the greatest country in the history of the world. So, I’m grateful this holiday season for you, Mr. President, you’re willing to take a bullet for all of us and by all of us it’s the American public.”

Actually, no one asked you, Lee. But plenty of folks would rather take a bullet than listen to more of that.

Kristi Noem, Secretary of Homeland Security:
“You’ve saved hundreds of millions of lives with the cocaine you’ve blown up in the Caribbean.”

Now, there was plenty of other sycophancy from Noem, who served the 2.2 billion residents of South Dakota as their governor. But I’m sorry, creature, did you say Trump saved “hundreds of millions of lives” blowing up cocaine in the Caribbean? I thought you did.

Howard Lutnick, Secretary of Commerce:
"A year ago today I was working on transition with President Trump, right, to build the greatest cabinet ever for the greatest president ever. And I, as I sit here today, I can’t be more proud of how you did it, sir. You’ve created the greatest cabinet. It is a joy to be at this table.”

I’m sorry, sir. That's debatable at best.

Lori Chavez-DeRemer, Secretary of Labor:
“You made the American people realize the American dream is real for the American workforce. And it’s been under your leadership, Mr. President, that over 2 million jobs that have been created since you started have been native born workers. And that is the difference between this presidency, this administration as opposed to the Biden administration where mostly foreign born or federal government jobs.”

Chavez-DeRemer is the one dreaming. The claims about Trump rely upon taking raw data out of context without seasonal adjustments. The Biden stuff is a full-out lie: Native-born workers gained about 7.5 million jobs versus 6.5 million for foreign-born — during his four years. That is what once was called a “fact.”

Attorney General Pam Bondi:
”It’s unbelievable, on the ground in DC and Memphis…we have a 100 percent increase in the arrest of violent criminals, thanks to your leadership.”

That would be impressive were it not for the fact that no publicly available dataset even exists for tracking “violent criminal arrests” in D.C. or Memphis that could serve as a baseline for what Bondi is inventing here. Give them credit for chutzpah: This one’s just made up out of thin air.

Doug Burgum, Secretary of the Interior:
Mr. President, you’ve assembled an incredibly talented group here. If you took a look at this group compared to any Fortune 500 leadership team, any group of startup folks, I mean, this is an amazing group and the breadth of what’s being accomplished and the timing couldn’t be better because, with your leadership and vision, you’ve set us up for this age of abundance as we head into next year, the 250th anniversary of this country….the White House has never looked better, all because of your vision and leadership. So, again, thank you, sir. You’ve given an incredible Christmas gift to Americans by setting us up for an incredible 250th anniversary.

Doug, thanks for not finishing that part about the Fortune 500 companies.

Scott Turner, HUD Secretary:
“When you were giving your report, which was fantastic, and I listened to the report of all my colleagues here and those that will come, it reminds me when I played in the NFL, we had this thing called game film, you know all about film, and we had a saying that said the film don’t lie. The film tells the real story. And I hope that the American people when they watch the film that’s going on now in this time in our history, that they will see that America is greater today than it ever has been. And so, I thank you for that. And thank you for giving us good stories that we can tell for the American people.”

Thanks, Scott, for the newest slogan of the Trump Administration: “Film don’t lie. We do.” And for proving that covering NFL wide receivers — which you did so well — doesn’t mean you won’t fumble enforcement of the nation’s fair housing laws. Which you have.

Agriculture Secretary Brooke Rollins:
These jobs are hard, but the joy every day in getting to fight for America and save the country is the privilege of all of our lifetimes, I believe. So, thank you for that. At the US Department of Agriculture, the people’s department — Abraham Lincoln launched this department in 1862. But under your leadership we have finally again put farmers and ranchers and rural America first.

Finally, an Abe Lincoln reference. But apparently, Ms. Rollins statement was cut off. The full sentence should have read, “Under your leadership we have finally again put farmers and ranchers and rural America first in bankruptcy court, in climate-fueled disaster zones, and in the crosshairs of every trade war you lost.” Just editing.

Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent:
“We’re going to see real wage increases. I think next year is going to be a fantastic year, taxes, deregulation, energy certainty. That’s why everyone, with your leadership, is coming to America.”

Everyone? Really? Not if they read this transcript from the cabinet meeting.

The fawning references to “your leadership” from Bondi, Rollins and Bessent were just three of 19 served up Tuesday to Trump. Noem and SBA Administrator Kelly Loeffler led the way with four apiece, followed by three from Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

No mentions of Jeffrey Epstein.

Oh well, who’s counting? Trump, perhaps, but not Tuesday. It seems that the lead story coming out of the cabinet meeting was that Sleepy Don kept dozing off.

But it’s the rest of us who need to wake up to the soul-selling around the president.

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