This odious monster left a trail of misery — but I'll thank him for one thing

The New York Times is out with one of those stories that has to be read to be believed, so I did just that, three times, to spare you the pain.

This one, published Wednesday night, has to do with the grotesque Elon Musk’s sudden dissatisfaction with his work to break his piggybank, the United States Government. But instead of really zeroing in on the damage he and his gang of post-pubescent drooler-nerds have done since infiltrating that government, and doing God knows what with our private information, while smashing to pieces infrastructure designed to pay our benefits and keep us safe, the Times thought it important we hear about some alleged feud that has developed between Musk and the only person who is more disgusting than him on the entire planet: the orange, wrinkly America-attacking Trump.

Here’s how this story, that has five bylines on top of it, gets out of the box:

Elon Musk took a swipe at President Trump’s signature domestic policy legislation, saying it would add to the national deficit. He complained to administration officials about a lucrative deal that went to a rival company to build an artificial-intelligence data center in the Middle East. And he has yet to make good on a $100 million pledge to Trump’s political operation.

Mr. Musk, who once called himself the president’s “first buddy,” is now operating with some distance from Mr. Trump as he says he is ending his government work to spend more time on his companies. Mr. Musk remains on good terms with Mr. Trump, according to White House officials. But he has also made it clear that he is disillusioned with Washington and frustrated with the obstacles he encountered as he upended the federal bureaucracy, raising questions about the strength of the alliance between the president and the world’s richest man.

All that under this headline: “A Disillusioned Musk, Distanced From Trump, Says He’s Exiting Washington.”

I mean, ho-ly-hell. A disillusioned Musk?!

Was there not just ONE of the 20 editors who assuredly looked at this monstrosity, that gave even a single thought to the lives that have been wrecked since Musk and his Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) — which isn't a department at all and more like a hit squad — were given free rein and a metaphorical chainsaw to wreck OUR government and the lives of our public servants inside it??

How can this part be so casually ignored?

And because those lives were ruined, petty things like our drinking water, air traffic control, social security and Medicare benefits, and disaster relief are now in a jeopardy, but poor, poor “Mr. Musk” is the victim at the center of this tragedy:

“The cuts he wanted to enact were far more difficult than he expected and his lack of interest in learning more about the bureaucracy he considered toxic impeded his efforts, particularly on Capitol Hill, according to people familiar with his efforts, who spoke on the condition of anonymity to describe internal discussions.”

That’s a nice way of saying The Gang Who Couldn’t Loot Straight shot first and asked questions later, and now careers, lives and countless families’ well-being are dead because of it.

But I'll let a high-ranking official at the Social Security Administration I spoke to this morning tell it. She is working around the clock and is both angry and terrified:

“The devastation ... It is not just the loss of trust from the American public as DOGE data mines all of their information. It is not just the increased call volume of concern from the American public, crushing our ability to maintain services. The panic that has been induced has created more work and worse services as staff simply cannot keep up. The workforce is demoralized as they do not know if they have a future. That worry does not inspire an ‘all hands on deck’ attitude that would carry any agency through a high volume, efficiencies gained period.

I have literally picked up federal agents off the floor, crying. I have reminded them of their duty to serve the American public and inspired them to continue for one day more … reminding them that they are here to serve the American public and focus on the work at hand.

My component lost 95% of the workforce. The agency still expects 100% of work to be done. They have provided us no new automation tools to theoretically replace the hundreds of workers. We keep telling the agency it is impossible; the leadership they installed is deaf and tells us we are not efficient. The exhaustion of trying to keep the remaining workforce upright and functioning is starting to affect overall service. The error rates are climbing. It feels intentional so that DOGE can tell us how we are not good enough and should be replaced. But it is all due to sabotage.”

So hold your ears and cover your eyes while I say what so urgently needs saying on behalf of her, America, and the public servants whose lives have been ruined: “F––k that guy.”

If you are really interested in why our government isn’t as efficient as maybe we’d all like it to be, consider they’ve spent the better part of the past four decades operating under constant attack from mostly the Republican Party. They have dealt with hiring freezes and something called “continuing resolutions” (CR) that essentially fund the government at ridiculously short increments of approximately 90 days, because God forbid Congress does its damn job and passes an annual budget that they are mandating to do by law.

I wonder how Musk and all these fat-cat billionaire ripoff artists would do if they were told they were only able to plan out for 90 days at their companies. Actually, I don’t wonder at all, because they’d all fail on Day 91. There would be no hiring, no capital funding, no investment, no advertising dollars, no nothing.

The CR is code for dysfunction and has absolutely nothing to do with the public servants who are forced to work in that environment, and everything to with the people who caused it.

Expecting the government to run smoothly under these toxic conditions is foolhardy, but you almost never hear a single person in Congress say it, because it’s a helluva lot easier politically, and far more convenient to just blame the people inside the government for their epic failures.

After all, that chickensh–t tactic has worked beautifully since the days of Ronald Reagan, who once said on behalf of the billionaires who funded his campaign and pointed him around the room: "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are: ‘I'm from the government, and I'm here to help.’"

And if there was a God, his house would have blown down the minute those words dripped out of his fat, lying mouth.

With the exception of the Department of Defense, which is drowning in dollars and manpower, federal government staffing has stayed mostly steady the past two decades or so.

We’ve also heard a lot about all the money Musk palmed the greasy Trump to help him get elected. Most estimates have that in the $250 million range, but there’s never enough time spent on the astounding $38 billion — make that BILLION — in contracts, loans and subsidies Muskhas received from US, the taxpayers, tied mostly to his failing SpaceX and Tesla ventures.

Musk bitching about the government is like the guy who walks away from the table after a third helping of lobster and champagne, and then spends the night whining to everybody about his heartburn.

It’s disgusting and a blinking billboard for all that is really wrong with America, which has absolutely nothing to do with our government and the public servants who staff it, and everything to do with these billionaires who pillage it and then stuff their bottomless pockets with our money.

So now Musk is allegedly going back to where he came from, because hell is always open for business.

From the Times’ story:

Last month, Mr. Musk told Tesla investors and analysts that he would cut his time on government matters to “a day or two per week,” and since then, he has made a concerted effort to show that he is re-engaged at his companies.

“Back to spending 24/7 at work,” Mr. Musk, the Tesla and SpaceX chief executive, posted on X on Saturday. “I must be super focused on X/xAI and Tesla.”

Sure, pal, that’ll do it.

Before you allegedly go, though, I do want to thank you for all your work here in Wisconsin helping to get a top-notch liberal judge elected to our Supreme Court last month by trying to buy our votes, while making a complete a––hole out of yourself.

The $25 million you dumped in my state will go a long way toward making sure everybody, and not just odious people like yourself, are represented here.

At least you aren’t completely good for nothing.

(D. Earl Stephens is the author of “Toxic Tales: A Caustic Collection of Donald J. Trump’s Very Important Letters” and finished up a 30-year career in journalism as the Managing Editor of Stars and Stripes. You can find all his work here, and follow him on Bluesky here.)