Sarah Palin's Heavy Metal Grandma Show for animal killers is coming. You should be excited.

Former John McCain novelty act and english-as-a-third-language-when-saying-stuff word mangler Sarah Palin has another new teevee show starting real soon.

It is called Amazing America With Sarah Palin and it is the story of a small town girl who grew up and went to six or seven jucos and slightly bigger cosmetology schools so that she could talk sports on ActionNewsTeam-Wasilla, but instead she became the mama grizzly mayor of the meth capital of the Mat-Su valley, and then briefly the governor of that state that looks like Canada's hemorrhoid.

And if that is not amazing enough, professional Sunday morning talk show guest, John McCain, once asked her to be one myocardial infarction away from being Leader Of The Free World.

So amazing and only in America!

However, upon further review, it looks like her show is  going to be on the Sportsman Channel - which is like channel 3214 on your cable box - and it will probably be about killin' stuff, 'Murican=-style.

So here is a WWE-inspired rawk-out-with-your-Glock-out commercial of Sarah struttin' her stuff for thirty seconds, which is about eight seconds longer than Rich Lowry needs to 'fire all of his guns at once and explode into space ', if you know what I mean and I think you do...

Also, too.... (and I did not make these up):

Other shows on Sarah Palin's new network sound like porn shows: Hardcore Pursuit, Kings Of Gettin'Em, Mathews Dominant Bucks, YoungWild

— TBogg (@tbogg) February 22, 2014