Thanks, Norbizness, for reminding me that just because the Bushies are on their way out the door doesn't mean that they aren't still the worst motherfuckers to descend on our capitol. Attorney General Michael Mukasey has declined the no doubt exciting opportunity to prosecute his criminally minded cronies.


No criminal prosecutions are planned for former Justice Department officials accused of allowing politics to influence the hiring of prosecutors, immigration judges and other career government lawyers, Attorney General Michael Mukasey said Tuesday.

Okay, so we expected that. The Bush administration has made it clear that they believe that they're above the law, and probably above the laws of nature as well. But Mukasey decided it wasn't enough to be a ass-licking, back-scratching, criminal-coddling agent of tyranny. Oh no. He had to be an asshole on top of that.

But, he told delegates to the American Bar Association annual meeting, "Not every wrong, or even every violation of the law, is a crime. In this instance, the two joint reports found only violations of the civil service laws."

Of course not. Identifying something as a crime is not as simple as determining whether or not a law was broken. You have to examine the person who did the wrong and decide if they fit the description "criminal", in what case, no matter what they do, it's probably a crime. Does the person in question wear a 3-piece suit? Or do they have really big pants? Do they eat dinner with you and your friends, or do they sit in the car next to you in traffic eating a Big Mac? These may seem like silly questions to you, but to big important attorney generals, they make the difference between criminal and not-criminal. And that, of course, is the difference between crime and not-crime.

Naturally, I'm trying to get some perspective on all this. Is it really that big a deal? Maybe I should spend my time with the wingnutteria investigating the very serious question of whether or not there's documented evidence that Obama's mother ever ovulated on foreign soil.