One of my favorite pastimes during high school was hanging around outside the local OB/GYN clinic, waiting for all the cool girls to get done with their pap smears so that I could see if maybe they would go out with me. It was always the talk of the school.

"Sarah got her pap smear!"

"I heard Beth went, but couldn't go through with it."

Oh, youth...

Ohio Congressman Steve Chabot, though, wants to put a stop to that innocent childhood fun, petitioning to stop the move of a Planned Parenthood to a new location that is, apparently, too close to a school.

To a location that's opening by the end of the month.

And doesn't perform abortions.

And is moving about three miles from its old location.

I just hope that this new location keeps the insemination trucks, though. There was nothing like hearing that familiar tonal version of "Between the Sheets" echoing through the streets, watching as all the kids gathered up their blood tests and extra quarters to see if they could run out and grab an ice cold vial and begin the step towards an unnecessary abortion of their very own. Don't take away the next generation's childhood, Representative Chabot. Please.