It's true that pandas are lumbering fake bears that are going extinct because they suffer from sexual ignorance on the level that abstinence-only pushers could only dream of. But all this is more reason that pandas deserve your vote over religious figures and bitches. After all, when this is all said and done, bitches and religious figures will live on, assured that there is no danger of extinction for their people, but pandas will not have such comfort. So vote for pandas. Because you're a liberal, and so you root for the downtrodden and the underdogs, and pandas are all that plus way cuter than most underdogs.
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Stories Chosen For You
Trump Tower Chicago was near the scene of a brutal assault on a homeless man on Wednesday morning, Fox 32 reported.
"Chicago Police have released surveillance pictures of a man wanted for setting a man on fire downtown. A charred wall shows the exact spot of this vicious crime. Police say a 75-year-old man was sleeping on North Lower Wabash, near the loading dock for Trump Tower early Wednesday morning, when another man poured flammable liquid on him then ignited it," the network reported.
Police released photos of the suspect wearing a Hoodrich jacket.
"As for the victim, he's known by many as 'The Walking Man'. His real name is Joseph Kromelis. He's been seen walking Chicago's streets for years. It was 6 years ago, almost to the day, when Kromelis was beaten with a bat and hospitalized in another brutal attack," the network reported.
The network described Kromelis as fighting to survive. He is in critical condition at Northwestern Hospital.
Kromelis suffered third-degree burns over 65% of his body, the Chicago Sun Times reported.
“We were just told he’s most likely to die,” one law enforcement source told the newspaper
Watch:
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Trump and Pence's 2024 collision course panned as 'the showdown absolutely no one is waiting for!'
May 25, 2022
Donald Trump and Mike Pence may face off in the 2024 GOP presidential nomination contest.
"With his man prevailing over Donald Trump's chosen candidate, Mike Pence may well mark Tuesday's Georgia gubernatorial primary as the moment when his 2024 presidential bid got real," Trump biographer Michael D'Antonio wrote for CNN. "Pence's ex-boss, the former president who once was seen as a kingmaker in GOP politics, gave his full-throated support to former US Sen. David Perdue, who was humiliated in a blowout loss to incumbent Republican Gov. Brian Kemp."
He described it as "a rare act of open defiance" against his former boss.
"Now as he steps out from Trump's shadow, Pence is playing the 'nice' card with the skill of someone who has used it for many years," he explained. "And by contrasting himself with Trump without even saying his former boss's name, Pence is presenting himself as a kind of off-ramp for Republicans who think the Trump phenomenon has run its course — even as the former president continues to demand loyalty."
But comedian Stephen Colbert described it as "the showdown absolutely no one is waiting for!"
"The Late Show" imagined the contest with a fake promo.
"Coming in 2024 C-SPAN, the 2024 Republican Primary Debates," a narrator said.
"See all the action when the former president's one-time biggest fan debates with the former president's current biggest fan," the narrator said while Trump was displayed on screen.
\u201cOn #LSSC tonight: It\u2019s the showdown absolutely no one is waiting for!\u201d— The Late Show (@The Late Show) 1653529966
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For nearly two decades, "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" and its openly lesbian host have beamed into homes across America, busting stereotypes and charming daytime TV audiences with a feel-good blend of quirky comedy and celebrity cameos.
But after more than 3,000 episodes, a talk show that came to rival even Oprah Winfrey's in terms of its cultural impact departs Thursday under a cloud, after allegations of a toxic workplace at stark odds with its "be kind" mantra.
"When we started this show in 2003, the iPhone didn't exist. Social media didn't exist. Gay marriage wasn't legal," DeGeneres said last month, after pre-taping the show's final episode.
"We watched the world change -- sometimes for the better, sometimes not."
There is no doubt the cultural landscape has been upended since rising comedian DeGeneres came out in 1997 -- simultaneously as her character on sitcom "Ellen," and in real life with an interview on the cover of Time magazine.
DeGeneres was hailed as a gay icon, but her sitcom was cancelled a year later amid a backlash, and she spent five years in the wilderness before reinventing herself as a talk show host.
"It was a sensation, it was a landmark -- and it became a political football," said Mary Murphy, associate professor of journalism at University of Southern California.
"She led the way. She was probably -- and may still be -- the most famous LGBTQ person in America."
No 'gotchas'
While DeGeneres has never shied away from her sexuality, her Rolodex of A-list guests and light touch have been key to the talk show's success, especially in more conservative parts of America.
For 19 seasons, Hollywood A-listers and pop stars have jostled for seats on DeGeneres' couch, where they are invited to promote their latest projects, and never put through more than a gentle ribbing.
Some have appeared more than a dozen times -- Jennifer Aniston, the show's first-ever guest, will return for Thursday's finale.
"She is one with the celebrities, she's their friend. They know that. And she made it jovial," said Murphy.
"Maybe it was because, having been so burned, as she was, she didn't want to burn other people. There were no gotchas."
Audience members and the latest viral YouTube stars are also regularly invited on stage to enjoy their 15 minutes of fame, in human interest segments and wacky games.
"Ellen is this funny, silly, quirky character that really didn't take herself too seriously," said Jeetendr Sehdev, author of "The Kim Kardashian Principle."
"We hadn't quite seen a daytime talk show host before that looked like her and that behaved like her... She was the cropped haired woman wearing a suit and tie while everyone else was getting blowouts."
'Full of contradictions'
But rumors that life was less rosy backstage came to a head with a 2020 Buzzfeed expose alleging a "toxic work culture" including sexual harassment, bullying and racism.
Three senior producers were fired, while DeGeneres was accused of failing to mind her shop -- and of being less affable with employees in private than her cheery public persona would imply.
Last May, DeGeneres announced the show would end after its 19th season, but denied it was due to the workplace claims.
"I need something new to challenge me," she told The Hollywood Reporter.
But DeGeneres has courted increasing controversy, including her defense of comedian Kevin Hart after he withdrew as Oscars host in 2018 over a series of homophobic tweets.
"Suddenly, she kind of fell from grace," said Murphy.
"She seemed to be... in touch with celebrities, in touch with audiences, out of touch with the people working for her."
According to Sehdev, Ellen has always "been full of contradictions."
"That has been both partly the reason why she has also appealed to people, and has been capable of generating that mass appeal," he said.
"And at the same time, (it) has also been the reason why her integrity and her credibility and authenticity have been questioned."
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