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Chuck Norris: Public health care would have killed Baby Jesus

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‘Will Obamacare morph into Herodcare for the unborn?’ Hollywood star asks

Movie star and Mike Huckabee booster Chuck Norris has dragged the “War on Christmas” into the health care debate.

Norris has penned an article in which he suggests that Jesus Christ would have been among many “great souls” who would have been “erased from history” had a health plan similar to the one proposed by the Democrats existed in the Levant 2,000 years ago.

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In a column published at the conservative Human Events blog earlier this week, Norris suggested that if a government-run health care plan had existed in Bethlehem at the time of Jesus’ birth, the shame of Mary’s “out-of-wedlock” pregnancy would have pushed her into aborting her child. Norris wrote:

Lastly, as we near the eve of another Christmas, I wonder: What would have happened if Mother Mary had been covered by Obamacare? What if that young, poor and uninsured teenage woman had been provided the federal funds (via Obamacare) and facilities (via Planned Parenthood, etc.) to avoid the ridicule, ostracizing, persecution and possible stoning because of her out-of-wedlock pregnancy? Imagine all the great souls who could have been erased from history and the influence of mankind if their parents had been as progressive as Washington’s wise men and women!

The movie actor famed for his turns in the Missing In Action movies and Walker, Texas Ranger then asked, “Will Obamacare morph into Herodcare for the unborn?”

That refers to King Herod, whom the Book of Matthew describes as having ordered the killing of all male infants when he felt his rule was threatened by a usurper.

Norris may be surprised to discover that modern-day Israel has a universal, government-run health care system that is far more “socialist” than anything being debated in Congress at present.

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The reality that Jesus’ homeland subscribes to public health care is an uncomfortable one for some opponents of health care reform. Last summer, at a heated Town Hall meeting, one opponent of reform was so upset at an Israeli Jewish man who defended his country’s socialized health care system that she shouted “Heil Hitler!” at him.

Norris ends his column with a sneak preview of his next column, entitled “Away With the Manger,” in which he promises to detail “how the feds are whitewashing America’s Judeo-Christian heritage via a progressive, politically correct and pro-Muslim platform.”


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Fake Village People appear on SNL to tell Trump to stop using their music or they’ll shave Ivanka’s head

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The fake Village People made a surprise appearance on "Saturday Night Live" to tell President Donald Trump to stop using their music at his rallies or they'll shave Ivanka Trump's head.

"If you have been watching the Trump rallies, you probably noticed Trump dancing to The Village People," said Colin Jost during the Weekend Update segment. "If you haven't, let's take a look."

He explained that the Village People had their own special message for the president. The group of SNL cast members came out dressed in traditional Village People outfits and sang their cease and desist for the president.

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SNL does campaign ad asking what they’ll do without Trump to trash — then they have a revelation

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"What is the news even going to be about now?" the Saturday Night Life cast joked, saying that without President Donald Trump.

The fake ad began saying that everyone knows it could be the most important election of our lives.

"And the two choices couldn't be more different," the ad continues. "Do we want four more years of Donald Trump or a fresh start with Joe Biden? Can we survive four more years of scandal, name-calling, and racial division? Or do we want a leader who unites the country? I want to vote for Biden because he's better, smarter. better and better."

But, the cast members confessed, "I'm worried, because if Donald Trump isn't president -- when what are they going to talk about? Like, what would our conversations even be? Because the only thing I talked about for four years is Donald Trump. Every single day I tell someone, 'Can you believe what Trump just said?' My entire personality is hating Donald Trump. If he's gone, what am I supposed to do? Focus on my kids again? No thanks. He changed the game. He called the attorney general he appointed mentally retarded. That's some next-level sh*t!"

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Saturday Night Live’s Trump claims his secret COVID-19 plan is ‘under audit just like my taxes’

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"Saturday Night Live" began this week's show with a recap of the presidential debate showing President Donald Trump confusing Kirsten Welker with Hoda Kotb, Mindy Lahiri, and at one point, even a waitress.

Alec Baldwin explained that the coronavirus loved him so much that it didn't want to leave his body because it was so beautiful.

He also explained that he couldn't share his coronavirus plan because it was still under audit like his taxes.

Jim Cary toned down his portrayal of Joe Biden from last week's over-the-top yell-fest.

"Learning to live with it? We're learning to die with it, man!" said the fake Biden, quoting the real Biden, but with a glint of Clint Eastwood.

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