In a desultory rant Tuesday night, Comedy Central's Stephen Colbert jabbed conservatives who are promoting racial profiling and more radical techniques after the failed Christmas bomb plot against a commercial jetliner.


"Every time a young Muslim man arrives at the airport, the TSA should respectfully take him aside and give him an involuntary colonoscopy," Colbert quipped. "This cannot fail. Everyone knows that terrorists are all young, poor, disenfranchised Arab Muslims. Well, except the Christmas bomber, who is a middle-class well-educated Nigerian. Which, frankly, I don't think is fair.

"We elected a black guy. What more do Nigerians want? I mean, ever since we elected JFK, the Irish haven't terrorized us... So i guess we have to profile anyone who looks like a Nigerian too. Basically, all black people.

"And, I'm not saying all black people look alike," Colbert continued. "I'm saying I can't tell them apart. I mean, which of these guys is Kenyan? Of course, there was the dirty bomber Jose Padilla, so we'll have to go after Hispanics too. Then there's shoe bomber Richard Reid. God only knows what he is. Belgian? Patchouli? To be safe, let's profile anyone named 'Reid.'"

"Ben Franklin did say, 'Those who sacrifice liberty for security deserve neither,'" Colbert added wryly. "Then again, Franklin said a lot of things."

This video is from Comedy Central's The Colbert Report, broadcast Jan. 5, 2010.