Colbert: Darkness outside proves ‘the sun has been destroyed’
Critics have pointed to a blizzard in the Mid-Atlantic states as the latest evidence that climate change is a hoax. Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert used his “advanced weather forecasting technology” to determine that the current winter conditions prove that the world will be cold and dark forever.
Colbert announced an advancement in weather technology: The Dopplest 9000. “Others may be ‘doppler,’ but mine is the ‘dopplest,’ explained Colbert.
“As you can see, the East Coast is being slammed by a classic nor’easter,” said Colbert. “Especially hard hit is Washington D.C., where it has snowed twice in one week.”
“Therefore completely repudiating the theory of global warming,” Colbert decided.
But Colbert isn’t the only one that is using the current weather conditions as proof that global warming is a hoax. One Fox News guest told Neil Cavuto Wednesday that the weather is “burying [Al Gore’s] global warming theory.”
Fox News host Steve Doocy asked, “The weather is so rotten people are going ‘How can there be global warming?'”
Another Fox News host, Sean Hannity, said Monday that the snow storm “would seem to contradict Al Gore’s hysterical global warming theories.”
“That is simple observational research,” noted Colbert. “Whatever just happened is the only thing that’s happening.”
Taking a shot at climate change deniers, Colbert said, “Ask any peek-a-boo-ologist.”
But then Colbert used his high tech weather technology to break an even bigger story. “Which leads me to my next terrifying weather alert,” he said. “According to my dopplest 9000, it’s dark outside.”
“Based on this latest data, I can only assume that the sun has been destroyed,” concluded the comedian.
This video is from Comedy Central’s The Colbert Report, broadcast Feb. 10, 2010.