Comedy Central host Stephen Colbert on Wednesday said that he was thrilled that the Republican presidential primary had been extended after former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney failed to win Alabama and Mississippi.
"Long, slow and painful!" Colbert exclaimed. "Thank you, Jesus!"
"The Democrats had the same situation last time when they won in 2008," he added. "Now Republicans get that Hillary versus Obama magic minus any women or black people -- or magic."
Colbert went on to explain that Romney had not been able to close the deal with voters because former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum's authenticity, like declaring that teleprompters should be illegal.
"But we cannot stop at teleprompters," the Comedy Central host asserted. "I reject all pre-written words. That's why I'm against reading books. I mean, books are a lie. When I read the words, it makes thought sounds in my head like I'm thinking them."
Watch this video from Comedy Central's The Colbert Report, broadcast March 15, 2012.