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John Oliver mocks Queen Elizabeth II’s hats: ‘A penis that’s literally died of embarrassment’

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Last Week tonight host John Oliver paid sarcastic tribute to Britain’s Queen Elizabeth II on Sunday for becoming her nation’s longest-serving monarch after more than six decades on the throne.

“Essentially what I’m saying is: Congratulations your majesty,” he said. “You have spent 63 years doing a job that could have effectively been done as well by a styrofoam mold of a human head.”

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Oliver then showed a montage of the queen’s collection of hats, accompanied by some withering voice-over descriptions like, “A baby smurf’s uncircumsized penis,” “what mold thinks about when it masturbates,” and “a penis that’s literally died of embarrassment,” among others.

The host also took a jab at CBS News correspondent Mark Phillips for comparing the queen to a train, saying the 89-year-old monarch “just keeps chugging along.”

“For one thing, people need trains,” Oliver said. “Trains still serve a practical purpose in the modern era. You’re being mean to trains.”

Watch Oliver’s commentary, as posted online, below.

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CNN’s John Avlon slams Bill Barr’s lifelong career of ‘radical’ hypocrisy

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On Wednesday, CNN fact-checker John Avlon laid into Attorney General William Barr's agenda, breaking down his history as a hardcore partisan who adopts whatever beliefs are necessary to silence the left.

"Ten months into his tenure it's clear Bill Barr is one of the most radical and partisan attorney generals in American history," said Avlon. "In statement after statement, Barr seems to show he believes the attorney general should function as the president's personal lawyer. He cut a critical sentence and a half, hiding the first part that said Russia worked to secure a Trump presidency and the campaign expected it would benefit from their interference. On Monday, after Barr's own inspector general concluded there was no spying on the Trump campaign, Barr slammed the report on the president's behalf."

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Ex-Bush official shreds Barr for serving Trump’s ‘authoritarian’ ambitions

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MSNBC's Elise Jordan busted Attorney General William Barr's hypocrisy on surveillance.

The "Morning Joe" contributor and former White House official in the George W. Bush administration, where Barr also served -- and helped build the surveillance state before going on to work for telecommunications companies that turned over customer data to the government.

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WATCH LIVE: Justice Dept inspector general testifies in Senate about FBI-Russia report

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Justice Department inspector general Michael Horowitz will testify on Capitol Hill on his new report detailing the origins of the Russia probe.

The report criticizes FBI officials for making errors at the start of the investigation but concluded those errors were not intentional acts of political bias, and Attorney General William Barr immediately questioned Horowitz's finding that the probe of President Donald Trump's 2016 campaign was justified.

Horowitz will testify Wednesday starting at 10 a.m. before the Senate Judiciary Committee.

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