Stephen Colbert on Tuesday gave God the opportunity to respond to Bill O’Reilly, after the disgraced former Fox News host admitted he’s angry with the man upstairs for not protecting him from the multiple allegations of sexual harassment levied at him.
Colbert, “speaking of overgrown children,” started on O’Reilly’s claim God is to blame for his transgressions.
“I don’t want my name associated with this Bill O’Reilly business,” God interjected. “I’m not proud of it, but I don’t actually have the best history with women.”
“I guess your track record with women is a little spotty,” Colbert agreed.
“There was that time I got somebody pregnant and then totally bailed, kid shows up on my doorstep 33 years later, turns out, nice guy,” God explained, later admitting it’s his fault O’Reilly sexually harassed so many women.
“I gave him that free will and look what happened,” he said.
“Bill, I haven’t been there for you and I’m sorry,” God later said. “You’ve got enough problems in your life, what with looking like a pile of pancake batter poured over a scarecrow.”