So… If you weren’t on the Internet today you might have missed this, although by the looks of things Jacob Wohl will be a household name by the end of the day.
Here’s the short version of a ridiculous story.
A GOP operative reportedly tried to get women to sign a sworn statement saying Special Counsel Robert Mueller, when he was the Director of the FBI, sexually assaulted them. In exchange for committing perjury they would be paid $20,000.
That’s not even the craziest part.
Far right wing website The Gateway Pundit (Google “stupidest man on the Internet”) published documents claiming that in 2010 Mueller sexually assaulted a woman.
“The firm that produced this ‘investigation’ was quickly revealed to be SureFire Intelligence, which has a tiny digital footprint prior to the Mueller allegations,”
“Jacob Wohl, a 20-year-old conservative activist who is most well known for his reports from ‘hipster coffee shops in downtown LA’ about how Trump is secretly popular among young liberals, tweeted about the allegations against Mueller a day before they surfaced on Gateway Pundit, which he also writes for.”
Bellingcat links Wohl’s email address to the Surefire domain registration.
Most or all of Surefire’s employees apparently are fake, as are their photos.
“Their ‘Tel Aviv Station Chief’ uses a photograph of Israeli supermodel Bar Refaeli,” Belligncat reveals. “The ‘Deputy Director of Operations’ at SureFire is also fake, unless he moonlights as a minister from Michigan.”
NBC News, meanwhile, calls Wohl, “a disgraced hedge fund manager turned pro-Trump conspiracy theorist,” and adds – get this – that “calls to a number listed on the Surefire Intelligence website went to a voicemail message which provided another phone number, listed in public records as belonging to Wohl’s mother.”
So, it appears that someone was trying to frame Mueller to derail the Russia probe.
It clearly didn’t work.
The conspiracy to frame Mueller has been sent to the FBI which is now investigating.
It’s such a huge story it’s trending all over Twitter. Wohl at number one, Mueller at number three and Surefire at number eight:
Here’s how the Internet responded: with mockery and laughter, mostly about Wohl. Take a look.
A company called “Surefire Intelligence” has ties to this Mueller smear.
Jacob Wohl denied having ties to Surefire.
Surefire’s official phone number redirects to a voicemail box registered to Jacob’s mom.https://t.co/aVPzVDjGR4
— Ben Collins (@oneunderscore__) October 30, 2018
more like Jacob LOL tbh
— Eric Geller (@ericgeller) October 30, 2018
Friendly advice for @JacobAWohl. When you are caught and a criminal investigation started … best not double down bc FBI agents are lying in wait … whoops! Too late! #Morongate pic.twitter.com/cj5pEHDoW6
— Malcolm Nance (@MalcolmNance) October 30, 2018
I just left a hipster coffee shop where everyone was laughing their fucking asses off about Jacob Wohl hiding in his mommy’s closet after getting busted committing fraud.
— Brian Beutler (@brianbeutler) October 30, 2018
i just got out of a hipster coffee shop and everyone was talking about the possibility that jacob wohl is going to jail https://t.co/PQETeku5LW
— David Mack (@davidmackau) October 30, 2018
— BrooklynDad_Defiant! (@mmpadellan) October 30, 2018
I just want to thank @JacobAWohl for clearly spending so much time and effort in order to bring us all such joy today.
This ranks right behind my wedding and bachelor party for 2018.
— Matt Ortega (@MattOrtega) October 30, 2018
Seems unfair that Jacob’s mom built the Wohl and also has to pay for it
— Student Loans (@AdamSerwer) October 30, 2018
Jacob Wohl is what happens when conservatives start actually believing the inane conspiracy theories they push against the left, then go so far as to try to replicate them.
— David Atkins #11Justices (@DavidOAtkins) October 30, 2018
Look people, say what you will about Jacob Wohl and just keep dunking on him repeatedly, but please make sure it’s loud and clear for the folks in the back.
— Charlotte Clymer️ (@cmclymer) October 30, 2018
hey dumbass jim hoft and jacob wohl: Robert Mueller was SERVING JURY DUTY IN DC the EXACT DAY you claimed he raped a woman in NYC (August 2, 2010). that’s some surefire intelligence for ya pic.twitter.com/h1P0y85cAP
— ʟᴠʟ sᴇᴀɴᴄᴇ ᴘᴏᴛᴜs (@thetomzone) October 30, 2018
This is the greatest day on the Internet ever.
— Michael Weiss (@michaeldweiss) October 30, 2018
Told my 10-year old the Jacob Wohl story on the way home from school.
He did a full two-handed facepalm.
“His fake company phone number redirected to HIS MOM’S PHONE?! Dude, are you kidding? You never list your mom’s phone! That’s so basic.”
So. Basic. ☺️
— The Hoarse Whisperer (@HoarseWisperer) October 30, 2018
Watch Trump’s ’jaw-dropping’ interview with Axios on HBO
Trump ridiculed for his late-night ‘OPEN THE SCHOOLS’ rant: ‘Eat your Big Mac and shut up’
President Donald Trump demanded local school boards reopen schools during a late night tweet sent after 11 p.m. on Monday.
"OPEN THE SCHOOLS!!!" Trump demanded, in all capital letters with three exclamation marks.
The president was harshly criticized for his tweet, here's some of what people were saying:
You can't even get your own son's school to open.
They have refused.
The school where your son Barron is being educated refuses to open because it's not safe.
Now sit there, eat your Big Mac, and shut up.
Florida Democrats ask their own candidate to withdraw his candidacy after cocaine arrest: report
Democrats in Florida are asking their own candidate to end his campaign for county commission after an arrest for DUI and cocaine.
"A Collier County commission candidate's arrest in East Naples this past weekend has prompted calls from his party to drop out of the race," the Naples Daily News reported Monday. "John Jenkins, 55, was booked into the Naples Jail Center Sunday morning and faces a felony charge of possession of cocaine, according to a Collier County Sheriff's Office arrest report. He was released later that day on $5,000 bond."