It shouldn’t come as a surprise, yet it somehow does seem a little shocking: Donald Trump has a dedicated group of fans who write erotic fiction about him.
The presumptive Republican presidential nominee is the subject of numerous erotic fan fiction stories across the web, including a 10-page short story called Trump Temptations: The Billionaire and the Bellboy that at one point this year was a No. 1 bestseller on Amazon.
Here’s the description for this sordid tale, which was penned by a 22-year-old comedian named Elijah Daniel:
He was a billionaire, I was a bellboy, can I make it anymore obvious?
It all started one fateful afternoon in summer of 2012. I was working as a bellboy at the Trump Hotel in Hong Kong on an internship program. This was my first time in a big city. It was all I could have ever dreamed of, and more. But little did I know, it was all about to change.
The book is a mere 10 pages long but it’s received an average five-star rating from nearly 400 customer reviews — and no, we didn’t bother to check if any of those reviews were written by Newt Gingrich.
Inspired by the apparent success of this little story, other Trump erotica stories have also popped up on Amazon, including Temptations By Trump – The Billionaire & The Cocktail Waitress and Humpin’ Trump, a book that has spawned multiple sequels.
The basic stories behind these books are roughly the same: A young person gets their first big job in the Big Apple and meets Donald Trump, who takes them under his stubby-fingered wings and gives them life lessons they’ll never forget, along with lots and lots of sex.
Not all Trump fan erotica follows this particular formula, however.
This story posted on FanFiction.net, for example, imagines a threesome between Trump, President Obama and actor John Cena, in which Trump talks about loving “the feeling of Obama’s soft, fluffy dick.” This story, meanwhile, imagines a steamy secret love affair between Trump and Democratic rival Hillary Clinton.
And yes, there is an erotica story about Trump having a tryst with Russian President Vladimir Putin as well.
At any rate, if you’re the story of person who likes thinking about a 70-year-old thrice-married blowhard having sex, the internet has you covered.