Announcing that he is going on hiatus for the next month, Last Week Tonight’s John Oliver made a last ditch appeal to GOP presidential nominee Donald Trump to avoid a crushing electoral loss by coming on his show and dropping out — making him a national hero.
Calling Trump’s candidacy “the equivalent of a bigoted clown’s funeral pyre,” Oliver shared clips of Trump insisting that “he always wins,” before noting that he doesn’t stand a chance as he continues to plummet in the polls.
Oliver then made his proposal: “Drop out and admit your entire candidacy was a stunt — a satire to expose the flaws in the system.”
Oliver then diagrammed out a game plan by sharing clips from Trump’s speeches that could be used to by the candidate to prove that he had made already his point.
The HBO host pointed out how Trump has shown how easy it is to manipulate the media into giving him free and extensive coverage by stating outrageous things. According to Oliver, Trump was essentially saying to the cable networks: “You seem to like dumpster fires. I’m basically a pile of oily trash and a match — let’s dance.”
Oliver also stated that Trump has shown that — no matter what he says — callow career politicians in the GOP will back him, even after he famously said: “I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t lose any voters.”
With that, Oliver made Trump — whom he called a “racist voodoo doll” — an offer that would definitely appeal to his massive ego.
“Think how triumphant it would feel to say on national television, ‘I openly ran on platform of impossibly ignorant proposals, steeped in bigotry, and nobody stopped me for it. What the fuck is that about?'”
Oliver addressed Trump, “If you drop out to teach America a lesson, you would not be a loser — you would be a hero. There would be a federal holiday in your name!”
The HBO host then shared a 1996 young adult book called, “The Kid Who Ran For President,” featuring a 12-year-old — who sounds eerily like Trump when he speaks — who becomes president of the United States, only to step down because he’s not qualified.
According to Oliver, Trump was welcome to come on his show and use the conclusion of the book to end his campaign by using the 12-year-old protagonist’s resignation speech — which would sound natural coming from Trump, who once said “I have all the best words”.
In his speech Trump would say: “I have a question for all the grown-ups of America. Are you out of your minds? Are you expecting me to enforce the Constitution? I never even read it. I was out of school that day.”
“America must be in pretty bad shape if you elected me president,” Trump would continue. ” You better get it together and find some qualified people to run this country, or we’ll all be in big trouble!”
According to Oliver, “That is a perfect Trumpian address.”
Watch the video below via YouTube: