Author and radio personality Garrison Keillor is concerned about what will happen to Donald Trump after he loses the election.
In an essay published Wednesday, Keillor said, “I worry about Donald Trump. What is he going to do? He has damaged his brand.”
“The steaks, ties, home furnishings, fragrances, whiskey, resorts, condos, golf club memberships — when you associate yourself with white supremacy, male chauvinism and invincible ignorance, this is not smart marketing,” Keillor wrote.
Trump can’t comfortably return to “83 percent Democratic” Manhattan, unless he wants to “ride around in a black limo with smoked-glass windows through crowds of pedestrians giving [him] the finger? It’s no way to live.”
Does Trump have friends, Keillor wondered, or just “associates?” Do Howard Stern and Rudy Giuliani and Sean Hannity call up the Republican candidate to gab on the phone or make plans to get brunch, or is the big guy really all alone?
Trump should contemplate moving out to Nebraska, suggested Keillor, where he can get a 3-bedroom house for $150,000 and be surrounded by people who support his presidential candidacy at a rate of nearly 2-to-1 over Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton.
“There are wonderful warmhearted people there who love and admire him, so he would fit right in,” Keillor said, suggesting the town of Broken Bow — population 4,000 — as a possible new home for Trump International.
“He could make Broken Bow great, put marble floors and walls in the public school, put up a marble statue of George Armstrong Custer. He could attend a good evangelical church every Sunday and go to Bible reading Wednesday night where maybe he can learn more about those two Corinthians,” wrote Keillor.
“He’d need to be careful about touching women suddenly without permission though because many of them are armed,” he said. “If he grabbed one down there, she might cut him a new buttonhole. Even if she were a Christian.”