John Oliver began Sunday’s edition of “Last Week Tonight” by pointing out yet again that the words “President Trump” just don’t sound right together, like the words “baby pubes” and “haunted horse.”
The week began promisingly for Pres. Donald Trump with media figures falling all over themselves to compliment his speech to Congress on Tuesday night.
Less than 24 hours later, however, disaster struck in the form of revelations that Attorney Gen. Jeff Sessions met with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak and lied about it during his confirmation hearing.
Furthermore, Sessions hadn’t even been asked whether he met with the Russians, but simply volunteered the information, which Oliver likened to asking someone how their weekend was and being told, “Well, I definitely wasn’t masturbating into the Slurpee machine at the 7-ll.”
If that happens, he said, “You check the f*cking security cameras at the 7-11 and you don’t act surprised.”
But, Oliver observed, many Trump officials met with Ambassador Kislyak. The trouble is they keep lying about it whenever anyone asks them.
“It is not clear what is really going on here, yet, although one possibility is that this all amounts to what I’m going to call ‘Stupid Watergate,'” Oliver said, “a potential scandal with all of the intrigue of Watergate except everyone involved is really bad at everything.”
After looking at Saturday morning’s tweet-storm accusing former Pres. Obama of tapping the phones at Trump Tower, Oliver said that the question isn’t so much, “What did the president know and when did he know it?” as “Is the president physically capable of knowing anything at all?”
Watch the video, embedded below: