HBO host John Oliver went after stupid Republicans who have decided that children should go back to school even if they, their families, or their teachers and other faculty will die.
In a press conference last week, Vice President Mike Pence encouraged schools to ignore the Center for Disease Control rules about safety to reopen schools anyway.
"Mike Pence doesn't think CDC guidelines should impede schools opening?" asked Oliver. "Then what exactly are they for? These are public health guidelines they shouldn't be skimmed through and deemed ultimately inconsequential to our current situation. They aren't Mary Trump's book."
Meanwhile, economic adviser Larry Kudlow doesn't care and said people should just go back to school anyway.
"Just go back to school," he told the press last week. "You know, you can social distance, you can get your temperature taken, you can be tested, you can have distancing. Come on. It's not that hard."
It's unclear how many 6-year-olds Kudlow has tried to get to wear masks for more than an hour, but he clearly thinks he's an expert in education and the coronavirus.
"OK, real quick," Oliver began his rebuttal. "F*ck you, Larry Kudlow. You human-cufflink. You can't tell people to 'just go back to school' without answering questions about how that can happen safely. In fact, the only question that Kudlow is answering effectively there is what it would look like if someone made Rudy Giuliani 0.0001 percent hotter."
Safely reopening isn't going to be easy, Oliver explained because schools aren't set up to be socially distant, and children arguably aren't able to wear masks for eight hours a day. Right now, we can't even get adults to wear masks for a quick trip to Walmart without them throwing a tantrum in the store.
Oliver pointed out that at least one-third of K-12 teachers are over the age of 50, meaning they're at greater risk for dying of COVID-19 when they likely will get it. As a result, some teachers are preparing their Will and other estate planning documents assuming that they'll get the virus at work and die.
Then there is Sen. John Kennedy (R-LA), who said all of the European countries are able to reopen; therefore, the U.S. should too. The difference obviously from the U.S. and European countries is that we haven't gotten our virus under control. He does make a good point, Oliver said, an internet school is a poor option, particularly for children who don't have internet access or who don't have a computer. There are also children who need schools to get a healthy meal each day.
Finally, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (R-FL) earned Oliver's greatest attack after saying that schools should open because grocery stores were deemed essential.
"He's actually right there," Oliver said. "We have prioritized things like reopening bars and restaurants ahead of our children, and many advised that we go a lot slower. While, fortunately, the Ron DeSanti of the world ignored that advice and was like, 'Go enjoy. Have a drink. It's fine.' And it's almost impressive to watch a sitting governor make the argument, 'we were really dumb there. But the only fair thing is to also be really dumb now.'"
See Oliver's opener below:
