John Oliver explains why the only thing safe about the Olympics in COVID-ravaged Japan is the free condoms
John Oliver on the Olympics (Photo: Screen capture)

Japan is being crushed under the weight of the COVID-19 virus as the D variant spread and vaccinations were slow to start. While Japan has taken every step possible to protect Olympic athletes, "Last Week Tonight" host John Oliver noted that things don't appear to be all that safe.

Protesters have been in opposition to the Olympics amid the virus for over a month. Now there are more dying daily of COVID-19 in Japan than there were when the Olympics was supposed to happen in 2020. As of now, only 6 percent of the Japanese population is vaccinated, according to Al Jazeera News.

"And while I don't know what the inoculation percentage should be to safely host the Olympics, I'm pretty sure that right now, it should be higher than the number of entries in the 'Fast and Furious' franchise," said Oliver.

So, it's no surprise that most Japanese people oppose holding the Olympics this year.

There's one big problem with that, however. Oliver showed a video of Tokyo Olympic President Seiko Hashimoto explaining that the Olympics are 100 percent happening. Oliver explained there's a reason for that — Japan has no say in the matter. Despite being the host country, the Olympic contract signed by the host country in 2013 doesn't give them the power to scrap the games. Only the International Olympic Committee (IOC) has the power to do it.

While the Japanese people are rightfully concerned about themselves and the possibility of people bringing the virus into their country, there's also the matter of athletes carrying the virus home to their countries and spreading the deadly D variant even further.

"It'd be like if your child got the flu and you tried to reschedule their birthday only to get overruled by the clown you hired," said Oliver.

In the end, the only positive thing about the dangerous 2020 Olympics is that Japan will still be handing out all of the condoms athletes need and more.

Apparently, during the Olympics, there is a considerable amount of shagging. Olympic vendors hand out free condoms to assure those at the games to practice safe sex. This time, however, Japan gets to show off its superior technology in the safe sex arena. Meanwhile, the Olympics is begging people to carry the condoms home and use them away from highly contagious and deadly viruses.

Oliver noted that one of the many good things about Japan is its healthy relationship to sexuality, safe sex and condom technology prophylactics. He showed a video of a web series where an animated guy finds a magical rubber that turns into a suit of armor and he fights evil.

"So, just your average education, contraception-themed SciFi, action-cartoon ad for Japanese c*ck socks about an animated war in which the dress code appears to be latex casual," said Oliver. "All of which is to be continued, or as that ad says, 'to be condom.' That is so much more fun than what sex-ed is here in the United States where it's usually, here's a condom, here's a banana, let's never speak of this again."

See the video from Oliver below:



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